# And it's only getting worse...



## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

It seems I can't win. Now that Merlin is becoming a bit less fearful, thanks to the meds, the housebreaking part is going down the drain.

He won't poop outside since there is snow, and now I just found out he has been lifting his leg in his crate. I had stopped checking every day for accidents, since he had been okay for more than 3 months. Now with the poop problem, or for some reason I don't get, he's peeing inside also ! It happened at least 10 times, there were 3 different crusty, dried, thick spots. Outside the crate, so he's lifting his leg.

I am going back to work in about 1 month. I have been working on him for 5 months, it should have been more than enough. Now I don't even know what I am going to do with him while I'm away. He can't have the run of the house, and the crate doesn't work either. Pipi pads ? Since he lifts, it's going to be all over the place. Plus, I have allergies and urine and poop smell aggravate it.

I am seriously questioning myself. I am going nowhere with this dog. I can't take him back to the breeder, I can't find him a more suited family, nobody will want to deal with this crap. I see no light at the end of the tunnel. I had to fix the poop problem, but now lifting his leg inside on top... :-(

Please send me good vibes, I don't know what to do.


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## nifty (Aug 2, 2013)

Oh no, Dechi! I am so sorry you are having these issues with Merlin. Wow, it has not been easy at all!

Sending you good vibes from Chicago!


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## zooeysmom (Jan 3, 2014)

Dechi, I'm so sorry that the situation is so difficult. I really hope and will pray for a solution for you and Merlin. Hugs to you both!


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## patk (Jun 13, 2013)

maybe a potty patch? 


[ame]http://www.amazon.com/Potty-Patch-Small-Pets-Under/dp/B002MVN4EO/ref=sr_1_47?ie=UTF8&qid=1452481138&sr=8-47&keywords=patio+potty[/ame]

there are several different ones on the market. some even come with something resembling a fire hydrant or "wall" on one side for leg lifters.

here's a site that lists some choices out on the market:

http://www.doggies.com/articles/149-indoor-dog-potties.html


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## Khaleesiandthepoms (Feb 25, 2014)

That sounds like a handful you have my sympathy. As far as the urine situation I find belly bands are great for that and you could always try to get started on litterbox training or a potty patch?


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## Caddy (Nov 23, 2014)

Sorry Dechi, I can hear the frustration and desperation in your post, you've worked so hard with him. I hope things seem brighter in the morning.


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## patk (Jun 13, 2013)

belly bands sound like a good idea. i think i recall poodle foster mentioning using them when taking in rescues that are not dependably house trained.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Thanks for the suggestions. I think we'll try the belly bands if I see anymore spots. Now that he sleeps in the smaller crate, it might help. I much prefer giving him the freedom of the bigger crate, but I don't have much of a choice right now. He has to earn his rights back. I don't want him to urinate on a potty patch because it is not helping my allergies and I am very sensitive to strong smells, like urine.


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## BorderKelpie (Dec 3, 2011)

I wish you lived closer. He'd fit in with my daughter's little beastie girl. I have had to make a modified way to live with Pixie. She is all of 6 pounds, but dog aggressive and refuses to house train (shelter dog, I think I know how a nice looking purebred ended up in the shelter *sigh). I tried crating her, she pottied then frantically spun, ran, jumped, etc in it. Turning her loose in the house with a potty patch didn't work, she hasn't caught on to the idea of pottying only on the patch and would fight horribly with the other dogs. 
I went to Tractor Supply and got one of their little gazebo pens, set it inside a large kiddie wading pool with a tiny little dog house, a potty pad and her water bowl and toys. She's allowed loose on leash only and very closely supervised. She has finally managed to learn how to make a friend, so sometimes, I will leave Laurie's other little nightmare, I mean, dog in the pen with her and they seem content enough. I change the pads as used (if there's even a spot on it, she'll go elsewhere) and mop the pool daily. Once a week, it goes into the shower for a hose down and she gets a bath. 

Since you are so sensitive to the smell of urine, I don't suppose that would be an option, but hopefully, maybe the hoops I jump though will help inspire some sort of solution for you .

ETA: This sounds horrible now that I read it, Pixie does get house and couch time, my daughter is a rabid couch potato and lets Pixie on the couch for hours while they destroy brain cells in front of the TV. Pixie is also learning the Barn Hunt thing, I was hoping an activity would help her learn to focus, and get the kid off the couch. I swear, she does not spend 24/7 in solitary confinement! lol


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## ericwd9 (Jun 13, 2014)

All training needs constant reinforcement until about 18 months or it can slip. Toys have little hold over time in their bladder. Some inside facility and the training to use it is needed. Grace can go 14 hours but her eyes and back legs are crossed then. Ho Ho!! When ever I go to the "bathroom" I say to Grace "daddy go do pee-pee" she waits for me to return rather than following me as is more usual. Recently I was ill (as I am more and more often as I age) I was sleeping and home alone except for Grace. She needed to go and came to me and "nose bumped" me. In my torpor I ignored her. She went into the bathroom and positioned herself over the floor grating and managed to have most of her pee go down! She misses nothing!! I knew a JRC bitch who would jump up onto the toilet and do her business but she never flushed the toilet? Who knows a Toy might do that?
Eric


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## Tiny Poodles (Jun 20, 2013)

So sorry, I hear your pain...
First of all, you should try the belly bands - I think 50 percent of them just won't pee if they are wearing them, and that would be a really easy fix. The other half will, but at least that is better than peeing on your stuff.
Did you ever think that this backslide in housebreaking could be a side effect of the meds? Maybe something to discuss with your vet - perhaps a change of meds could be attempted?
As for an indoor potty solution, I think pads would be a whole lot better than a potty patch, because you can't constantly clean the grass, and the urine, it just collects in the tray. And you know there are hundreds of different types and sizes of pads to try (including human bed pads which 
I prefer for my girls), and the level to which they absorb and permit odors varies widely.
And for boys who lift, there are two solutions. Some will put the pad right up against a wall and tape a second pad on the wall. Others will use a large pad, and then put a coffee can or something covered with a pad in the center of it for something to aim at.
But alas, pad use still has to be trained - it is not something that comes naturally to them, and such training would be quite difficult with a dog who messes in his bed, and does not happily take treats.
If I were you, I would belly band with a pad in the band at night in the crate (be sure to get a good fit because they can slide off when they lay down), and tether him for training during the day. You will have it covered 24x7, and I think that by doing that you have a very good chance of having it resolved in a month.


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## fjm (Jun 4, 2010)

I would certainly get belly bands - I have used them with visiting males and they are very effective, and not smelly if checked and changed regularly. But I think I would also talk to poodle and small dog rescues in your area. Firstly, they may be able to offer help and support - they must deal with these problems over and over again. In the UK some even have qualified behaviourists who can help. And secondly they can give you a better idea of your options, should you get to the point of feeling completely overwhelmed and unable to cope. Hoping this is just a blip, and that a good sleep, belly bands, and getting used to the weather put both you and Merlin back onto an even keel, but it is always a good idea to have a back up plan.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Thank you everyone. It is true, I feel overwhelmed right now and very disappointed. Also frustrated with him. He is 100% lap dog. All he wants all day is to be near me, preferably on my lap. 

We will get through this winter. It's his first, and it is so hard. If I had known it would be so hard, I would have stayed away. Now I regret that I ever made contact with that "breeder". I even hate her sometimes, for what she did to him, and the price I have to pay.

I am very stressed with going back to work after so long, and Merlin's problem aren't helping at all.

I need to find a way of letting go, for my own sake. Yes, I will be getting belly bands for sure. It is sad for me to have to resort to this, but it is acceptable given the fact that I don't have a choice.

I will call the vet tomorrow and see what she thinks about all this. If I have to choose between having a neurotic dog off meds and a pooping / peeing dog on meds, what will I do ? 

All this, all the problems I have with him, they're all caused by one single thing : incapacity to adapt to change and different situations in a normal delay. It all comes down to lack of socialization. It will never be said enough how crucial it is.

At least I am lucky I have you for support, it means a lot, really.


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## twyla (Apr 28, 2010)

Dechi don't give up yet, as you say it's his first winter. My first poodle Baby, she had her issues but she was a dream on the leash and a breeze to housebreak until it got really cold that first Winter, wind chills in the -10s and below seems she only wanted to potty on dry leaves, or so I thought. I was extremely frustrated she was my first dog, my first poodle. There are severals things you can try, remembering that he is a tiny dog and it may just be too cold outside for him. Leave more hair in between his toes and paw pad, layer his clothes for when he goes out, try boots or mushers secret. I finally trained Baby to use a pee pad inside with a urine smelling spray so that she had an option to go inside when it was too cold, it was frustrating for both her and I until I did so. After that winter pottying wasn't a problem, and yes she did go outside.


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## glorybeecosta (Nov 11, 2014)

Dechi I feel for you and do not know if I could handle as well as you have. I wish you the best and the baby as well. But you have to do whatever is best for you. I have always said I will not have my house ruined by my pets.


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

Sorry to see this news Dechi. I will add my name to the list of those suggesting belly bands, but also the small crate. Until a dog is really totally there a crate that is too big just is an invitation to making mistakes.

I know this has all worm your patience, but I do think the pattern is very similar to things I've seen with other rescue dogs. They make great progress with the most important concern areas and then slip with something else. I've seen new issues appear as far out as a year after the dog was rehomed. I don't mean to be bumming you out, but you need to be watchful of everything for at least another 6 months I think.


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## Poodlerunner (Jul 4, 2014)

I had a shy Yorkie boy once. A very expensive one --no rescue. I thought his problems were due to lack of socialization but he was genetically shy. For one thing, he wasn't able to eat out of a bowl for his distrust of it. He was a mental wreck in so many ways. He lived in a belly band and it was not so bad. You keep them clean shaven and use baby wipes when you change the belly band. Clean house!

This little boy, however, became a self confident little man when I took him for walks in the woods. He would be the leader. It was so good to see him shine like that. Maybe Merlin has a happy place as well.

I would accept him as he is and make adjustments. He may come around but he may not. The life he leads may have to be different than the life that a normal dog leads. I know there was no fixing my little dude and accepted him as special.

pr


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

I am trying to accept him as he is, but at the same time I know he can do this, because he has done it for almost 5 months now.

So I would rather see this as a temporary setback and as a hard, first winter. When spring comes back, he will have the whole yard and will be able to go in the back, where he likes. I am sure he'll be okay then.

This morning I was more stubborn than him. I sent him outside once, he peed and came back. Crated him a few minutes, then sent him again. He is not stupid, because he goes down the stairs when I tell him to go poop, pretends to smell the grass, and then runs up the stairs. So he knows what I want. So I kept sending him back down and after about 15 minutes of this, he first lifted his leg to pee and then squatted to poop. I felt like I Had won the lottery ! He got praised a lot and was very happy about it !

So I get a poop break for today, yeah !


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## Streetcar (Apr 13, 2014)

Sending hugs, Dechi. I wish I had helpful suggestions and think if Merlin can be persuaded to use pads in an ex-pen setup while you're at work, it might be a thought. Mostly sending you comfort and hugs .

ETA: Just saw your big win for this morning -- woohooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## mom2Zoe (Jun 17, 2014)

I am so sorry you are so frustrated and struggling.

I give you so much credit for working so hard with merlin and sticking it out.
I pray things will get better for you!!!


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## MiniPoo (Mar 6, 2014)

I am sorry that you have this to deal with, especially with your allergies. I have a potty log for my older dog Phoenix because even though we have a doggie door, sometimes she waits too long and will poop in the house. I made a potty patch for her when the weather gets bad, she will be confined to that area. My potty patch is homemade and has 3 layers, a tarp, pee pads on top of that, and it is covered with plastic indoor/outdoor carpeting. If she messes in there, I spray it down with antibiotic enzymes spray and change the pee pad underneath. I also have a candle in the sunroom to use if she poops in there. So there is not really too much of a smell.

Perhaps when you go back to work you can set up some kind of potty patch with the small crate open into that area. It might take the stress off of you. That doesn't mean that he can't go outside when you are home, just that you have a backup plan.


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## Beaches (Jan 25, 2014)

Delhi, just an idea for when you are working. Can you put Merlin in your bathroom confined with a baby gate? That with the belly band might solve your problem.


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## glorybeecosta (Nov 11, 2014)

I had a male Yorkie got him a 10 weeks, form a breeder, not a rescue, or re-homed. House broke in no time. Then my boyfriend moved in and it was awful. I had a white satin sofa, would put him outside he would go, then come in. Look right at me and lift his leg and pee on the sofa, knowing her would get in trouble. After 6 months of that I re-homed him and they adored him. Maybe I should have dumped the boyfriend then and kept the dog.


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## snmim (Sep 7, 2015)

Dechi I am so sorry you are going through this and how difficult it must be. I agree with the belly band suggestion and hopefully when this winter passes these issues will resolve. Even the best potty trained dogs can have an accident! The most horrifying thing happened the other day. I took Mira to my neighbors house and to my horror she started pooping on her floor!! It was the first time she pooped indoors since she was 4 months and it was worse since it wasn't even in my own home. The next day, she jumped up on my brother's bed and peed on it! I've started praising her for going outside again and so far she's clear for now!

Maybe putting Merlin in an ex pen will help? Treat him like a puppy and take him out every hour? I do not have good advice but I am thinking about you and Merlin.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

I was thinking about the peeing. Merlin is a very different and sometimes strange dog. One night I put him to bed in his crate and decided to give him the freedom to get out of his crate. So I left the door open and figured he would go in the doggy bed with his sister.

Instead, I guess he was disoriented and perplexed by the change, he decided to pee in the middle of the room. He was in his crate when I went to get him in the morning. That incident made me think of this week, when I tried to make him poop and I was putting him back in his crate, then putting him outside, and so on. Maybe he peed because he didn't understand what was happening. Maybe he doesn't have a lifting problem, just trouble with coping with change ?

I will be monitoring this closely, but that might be an option.

He will be crated when I go back, with a belly band on, for a good while. I just haven't decided if I will use the medium crate (big enough for a welsh terrier) or the big crate (big enough for a german shepard). I still have time to think about it.

Leaving him in my office with the door closed, where his crate is, would also be an option.


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## MiniPoo (Mar 6, 2014)

If you don't mind my asking, will he be crated all day when you go back to work? If so, that might be a really big change for him and you said he does not do well with change.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

MiniPoo said:


> If you don't mind my asking, will he be crated all day when you go back to work? If so, that might be a really big change for him and you said he does not do well with change.


Well. If we hadn't had this poop problem, I might have considered giving him the run of the house. But now I don't think so. So he would be crated part of the day, until my daughter comes back from university. As soon as he is to be trusted, he will have his freedom. I don't like crating dogs when I'm away.

I have put him in his crate when going away, though. Just not everyday and for as long.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

This is not getting any better. i give him pumpkin every day, but honestly I don't think he's constipated, and ever was. He poops once a day.

He is so stubborn still and won't poop in his designated (shovelled) area outside. If I force him to stay outside, after a while he just sits there, shaking and looking miserable. Depending on the temperature, I can leave him outside from 2-15 minutes. I can't risk him freezing his paws.

So it's just not working, he poops in his smaller crate during the night. I am going back to work soon after being sick for 7 months, I just can't exhaust myself by taking him outside every 2 hours during the night and not sleeping. I can't risk losing my job because of him.

I will remove his blanky in the crate, that is where he buries his poop. Maybe it will bother him more. I had to do this at first when I got him, because he was doing the same : using the blankie to cover up his mess.

I keep giving him the pumpkin, it might help. But I have a feeling this will be a difficult winter.

And to those who are wondering why I don't put pads on the floor, it will make my other dog, very well housebroken, turn back to soiling. She is a tiny 4 pound chihuahua, not much hair, but she does go outside and she's a very good girl. So I don't want to ruin her. And I can't separate them, she's lost without him.

So I don't see any solutions for now, i will keep you informed.


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

I am sorry to see that you don't hold out much hope for fixing this right now. Failing all else I will wish for an early spring thaw for you.


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## MiniPoo (Mar 6, 2014)

I am sorry that there is not any improvement. Not that it matters, but I still don't understand why you cannot put pee pads in an x-pen area with his crate inside it. Your chihuahua cannot be with Merlin when he is crated. You just need to get through this winter, then you could try Merlin again outside. 

You are a very determined person and if anyone can figure this problem out, it will be you. I just think you are making the situation worse for yourself with this "only outside" insistence. 

When your 4 pound chihuahua is older and has a hard time with the cold winter, are you still going to insist she braves the Canadian winter outside? 

I speak of this because of my own situation where my 50 lb PWD is having problem going outside in the Illinois winter weather. I imagine it would even harder for her in Canada.


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## nifty (Aug 2, 2013)

I'm so sorry, Dechi. This sounds like an exhausting and frustrating situation. I know you are doing everything you can to balance Merlin's needs with the rest of the household and your own. I really admire how hard you have worked with him for so long and I also understand totally that your own needs and that of the rest of your family/household must also be remembered and honored. Not an easy situation. Sending you lots of supportive thoughts.


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## Tiny Poodles (Jun 20, 2013)

MiniPoo said:


> I am sorry that there is not any improvement. Not that it matters, but I still don't understand why you cannot put pee pads in an x-pen area with his crate inside it. Your chihuahua cannot be with Merlin when he is crated. You just need to get through this winter, then you could try Merlin again outside.
> 
> You are a very determined person and if anyone can figure this problem out, it will be you. I just think you are making the situation worse for yourself with this "only outside" insistence.
> 
> ...



Right, giving him a pad in the pen is not going to convince your housebroken Chi to soil all over the house, at worst she might start using the pad too, and what is so bad about that? Mini Poo is right, in her last year Tangee was using the pad maybe every hour and a half - 3 hours. It probably would have been more frequent if she had survived to go home on the lasix as was planed. If she had not been pad trained, she would have had to of worn diapers!
And you know it isn't a given that your Chi will automatically start using the pad because Merlin does. Teaka has gotten sloppy in her old age, and I have a whole set-up for her with a pad on a tray, with two larger pads underneath to catch the overflow, and I don't want Timi to learn to have that much space and be sloppy, so Timi has her little 18" pad in a different room, and they each use their separate pad - wouldn't think of using the other one's pad. When Teaka is gone I will remove her set-up, and slowly move Timi's pad there as that is where I prefer to keep it.
Sometimes when you have a dog with issues, there has to be some give and take to make it work - you cannot totally train them into your lifestyle, you have to make little adjustments in your lifestyle to accommodate who they are.
You know how difficult it is to score a great apartment in Manhattan? Well I had one double the size that I have now, and I had to give it up because of Teaka's noise reactivity - that apartment, much as I loved it got way too much street noise, and had no entranceway - Teaka could sit right by the door to the hallway and hear every sound that went by. I went through and spent a LOT just to get an apartment where I could live peacefully with Teaka!


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

I understand what you're saying, but pipi pads are just not something I want in my house. As I said, I Have used them before but I dislike them very much. My Chi was hard to train, she is stubborn like many small dogs and I am sure she will use the pad if given the chance. I never had a dog whou couldn't go outside when older, but if ever it happens, we'll cross the bridger when we get to the river.

If I give Merlin a pipi pad, I am afraid he will revert to peeing inside. Right now he does it outside. That's one thing he does right and that I don't want to mess with. Also, a male going on a pipi pad, been there, done that, misses more than half the time. It's not like a female. So, this is not a good solution for me.

We'll see how things go. I am just trying to accept that he poops in the house, and hoping he won't do it forever.


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## Tiny Poodles (Jun 20, 2013)

Dechi said:


> I understand what you're saying, but pipi pads are just not something I want in my house. As I said, I Have used them before but I dislike them very much. My Chi was hard to train, she is stubborn like many small dogs and I am sure she will use the pad if given the chance. I never had a dog whou couldn't go outside when older, but if ever it happens, we'll cross the bridger when we get to the river.
> 
> If I give Merlin a pipi pad, I am afraid he will revert to peeing inside. Right now he does it outside. That's one thing he does right and that I don't want to mess with. Also, a male going on a pipi pad, been there, done that, misses more than half the time. It's not like a female. So, this is not a good solution for me.
> 
> We'll see how things go. I am just trying to accept that he poops in the house, and hoping he won't do it forever.



You wouldn't be alone, there are many small dog owners that just accept that their dogs pee or poop in the house, and if they are comfortable with that, I think that is totally fine.
The thing is, you don't seem comfortable with it, not at all. That is why we are encouraging you to find a compromise in the middle (having him eliminate in one, easy to clean-up spot) - though it may not be your ideal, in the long run I think it would make you happier than having him pee and poop in his crate and possibly extend that behavior to the rest of your house.


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## glorybeecosta (Nov 11, 2014)

Bella is 8 and goes out side, Cayenne has a potty patch and Bells will not use the potty patch, so I do not think you would have to worry about the other reverting to going in the house. Bella will not go in the house or Cayenne's potty patch, but when Cayenne goes Bella expects a cookie also. My potty patch does not smell at all of pee naturally I pick up the poop. I agree I would try something going up the wall as he is a male, mine are females, but my first was male and never lifted his leg


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## Tiny Poodles (Jun 20, 2013)

glorybeecosta said:


> Bella is 8 and goes out side, Cayenne has a potty patch and Bells will not use the potty patch, so I do not think you would have to worry about the other reverting to going in the house. Bella will not go in the house or Cayenne's potty patch, but when Cayenne goes Bella expects a cookie also. My potty patch does not smell at all of pee naturally I pick up the poop. I agree I would try something going up the wall as he is a male, mine are females, but my first was male and never lifted his leg



It wouldn't be so difficult to put a pad in an expen and tape a pad next to it on the pen wall.


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## glorybeecosta (Nov 11, 2014)

I tried to get Bella to use the potty patch as well, she look at me as if I was crazy and will not go near it other than just passing when going to the door.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Having a dog pee in the house is 10 times worse than pooping for me. It has a strong smell and it will affect my health. I can't ask anyone else to clean up for me.

To be honest, I would rather not have a dog than have a dog who pees in the house.

You are right TP, I don't accept this situation at all. I am aggravated and frustrated. I need to find some kind of peace with myself and do something about it, but my usually very efficient brain is offering no solution. Everything that was suggested is actually good advice, but none of it clicks.

I think I am going to take a break from the subject for a while and try to stop focussing on it and stressing over it. Today I found 3 poops in the house, I mean he now has to be kept on a leash, just like the first days. We regressed to 0% progress. I am beyond myself.

Thanks to everyone who gave me advice, I took it all in, I am just not ready. I will try to avoid the forum for a while, until I can be positive again. I hate being like this.


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## snmim (Sep 7, 2015)

I really do hope you get through this, I can understand whatever measures you choose to take. Having a dog mess in the house with your allergies and busy work, it would be too hard for me. I know you will think of something, but I do have one more suggestion for you.

Maybe you could just put an ex pen in front of the backyard door? That way, whenever he finishes a meal and you can take him out, but if he doesn't go outside put him in the ex pen so there are no accidents all over the house. After 20 minutes of being in the ex pen, try again and put him outside. If he doesn't go put him back in the ex pen but if he DOES go potty outside he gets his freedom in the house but is tethered to you. No need for potty patch, the ex pen will just be a "time out" area of sorts until he gets what he needs to do. It will also be easier to clean up any accidents.

I know you are very frustrated, I was as well a few days ago when I experienced the same problems. I am the same and would not want any dog of mine to use a potty patch in the house. Especially with a boy dog, what hope would there be in putting a pad on the wall, what if it goes the other way? As fragile as Merlin is, he needs SOME form of "preventative", he can't have any freedom the way he is now. It is good that you emptied the crate, I am glad there was no bedding inside when Mira thought to pee in there as well.


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## Tiny Poodles (Jun 20, 2013)

Sorry you are so stressed out by this. It sounds like it is time to take a deep breath and take a do over - you have a new puppy arriving tomorrow - how do train him and prevent him from having accidents?


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## patk (Jun 13, 2013)

dechi, read this article. i am not 100% sold, but maybe it has some relation to merlin's behavior:

Science Says Dogs Can Tell If You're Happy or Sad | Mental Floss


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## Shamrockmommy (Aug 16, 2013)

(((hugs))) 

Ok, how about a nice collection of belly bands? Poise or Tena pads, cut in half, work great to absorb pee rapidly. 

So I have this chihuahua that the neighbor gave to me 4 years ago now, when she was 5. She's 9 now. Anyway, she pees. Pees a lot. Vet check says no UTI, which is the first thing I checked. 

Next, pee pads. Worked great, actually! She used them faithfully. BUT. Jack the poodle trained himself to use it. Same issue. He lifts his leg, so it sprays all over or he would just barely hit the corner of the pee pad, and then rivers of pee all over the floor. 

Next, dear old Darby saw that the sunroom was the new place to pee. Perfect. Hate peeing outside anyway! So she just started peeing in the sunroom and no where near the pad.

Not to be outdone, Echo the PWD decided she had better mark over Darby's pee, because... pack order, you know!

Boy was I mad. I put up with this for about 2 weeks. The grout in the tile was stained and stinking, even though I soaked it in enzyme cleaner. 

One night I pulled up the pad, got out my carpet shampooer and used the upholstery attachment to scrub and suck up the dirty water from the tile and grout and got it all fresh and gleaming. Thank goodness. Took me about 3 hours to do a 10-x7' room. 

Then... measured Cookie (she's a girl, so panties), and sewed a diaper for her. First prototype was great, made more, and recently, I got some more cute fabric and made 4 more! She wets the pad a few times daily, and I just pull it off and stick on a new one. 
You can get coupons in the Tena bags occasionally, or through their website you can also fill out a form for a very generous free sample of their products. 

It really isn't ideal. I hate messing with the diaper, but she stands nice and still for me to pull her fluffy tail through the tail hole and velcro the sides up. 

I spent several years using a belly band on my first dog, a minpin, who was a marker for his entire life. When I finally gave up cleaning and scolding and crating (he would pee in his crate, too), and just popped the belly band on him, our relationship much improved at that point.

I know, I'm probably a little over the top with diapering, but it brought peace to the house, you know? Since the day I cleaned the grout, removed the pee pad and put on the belly band, life improved greatly for all of us. 

Hope this helps. 

Hang in there, you're doing a very good job with him.


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## peccan (Aug 26, 2014)

- cues for going
- plus a simple potty patch/pad
- located in the shower!

You could restrict access to the patch (treat it like an outdoor potty place, but indoors so you can use it however often you need/want with less effort for each visit) AND you could mitigate your allergy issues by rinsing the patch right after each use. And sprays from lifting would be painless to rinse away, too.

Sound doable?


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## TeamPoodle (Aug 10, 2015)

This may or may not be helpful but...

Riley stress-poops. At least that's what we call it. We've had him for about 3 months (rescue too) and when he gets overly stressed out about a situation, he'll have mucus-filled poops. 

We tried crate training him (the nice +R way, with one second disappearances and clicks and treats and all) and we dealt with a week of diarrhea and mucus-poops. SO gross. We gave up on the crate. It wasn't worth it.

We went to Thanksgiving at my in-law's house and were gone 4 hrs... the longest we've ever left him alone. You guessed it: came home to mucus-poop on the carpet (WHYYYY is it always on the carpet??!?!) 

Same thing happened Christmas day, when we were again at the in-laws. This time we think it was because the neighbors across the street had people over, so there were a lot more unfamiliar noises, car doors closing, etc.

So now we know... when he's stressed, mostly when we leave him, he poops. And we know he doesn't HAVE to go. He has his routines and his poop schedule, and these are out of the norm. They happen because he gets so stressed out that his digestive system goes into overdrive. It might be that Merlin is sensing the changes (you gearing up to go back to work, the weather, changes in routine) and being such a sensitive dog, they stress him out. 

I know it is tough, these little rescue dogs have their baggage and poor Merlin came with a lot of it. After Riley's first grooming with us, my husband asked how it went, and the most positive thing I could say was "well, he didn't bite the groomer." But let's say he came pretty dang close, wore the cone of shame for part of his session, and I fed him SO many treats, and praise. And this was with a groomer that is used to nervous dogs, so I stayed with Riley for the whole appointment and there were no other dogs in the shop. It is frustrating at times. I wish I could drop Riley off like everyone else does, but I can't. Just think back to your first days with Merlin, and what he does now that he wouldn't do then. Think back to all the little milestones you've celebrated. This is a bump, a big, stressful, frustrating bump, but he has made progress. You'll find a solution, and you'll find a way to work this out.


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## Carolinek (Apr 2, 2014)

My goodness- I forgot all about stress poops, as it's been so long since Lily has had them. She didn't have them at home, but invariably when we took her somewhere she would have a series of poops that would get progressively looser and mucousy. That went on for a couple years. 

The vet's office was a huge trigger- she would get very quiet and still when we took her- so wary of everything and she would shut right down. Then she'd start pooping. I called her "a serial pooper." Like I said, this lasted a couple years, then it just went away. Now she walks into the vet's office like she's his best friend. Sits for cookies, acts all flirty, and her tails wags a mile a minute. She's little Miss Social now- too funny.

Once in a while at agility, she will all of a sudden have to poop- even if she's just gone. But that's fading too the longer she does agility. 

You've gotten great suggestions. I'd probably embrace the belly bands for now, just for your own sanity- but you have to feel comfortable with it. I use them with my little grand dog- a seven year old Lhasa who feels he has to mark when he's at my house. He's often with us for several days- and I don't want my house smelling like dog pee. I use human sanitary napkins as liners. They're cheap and easy. It's not the end of the world. 

The greatest gift you can give him though is time. Time may not heal all wounds, but the more you layer positive experiences on top of the old, the more safe he'll feel, and the better he'll be. Hang in there!


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## patk (Jun 13, 2013)

if you start with the knowledge - as stated in that study i cited - that dogs can tell when humans are sad, then how likely is it that they can tell how we feel at other times? like people, not all dogs can handle the feedback they're detecting and some will stress out. it doesn't seem illogical that the stress can result in behavior that makes the owner unhappier. it becomes a vicious cycle. 

it can be very tough realizing that one has at least some responsibility for the psychological and emotional well-being of another human being. what happens when it's an animal with whom one cannot even converse or try to explore together how to work something out? there have to be compromises and the only one able to decide what they will be is the human who actually has control over both lives. there's both an upside and a downside to that - the trick is to find a way to squeeze the heck out of the upside and minimize the downside.


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

patk I think most of the people I train with would agree enthusiastically with the piece you posted the link to. If you look at the expressions on handlers' faces at obedience classes, matches and trials you will see lots of big idiotic over exaggerated grins on their faces. Most good people also know to minimize their expression of anger or disappointment when the dog is incorrect.

Part of the key though is that your inner feelings must match your demeanor. If you look happy outside but are frustrated inside a dog can sense that too and will act confused or frustrated to match the mixed signals you are sending. When Lily was a puppy I often found her very frustrating but made a point of trying to look happy to see her when I got home from work. It was only when I did some relaxing breathing to make my inner self be calm and matched to my outer demeanor that we got to the point where we had nice greetings when I stepped through the door.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

We have found a compromise. Too soon to know if it's going to work long term but it has worked for 1 day. Enough to completely dissolve all tensions in the house.

I got very mad at him before that and it was a breaking point. I lost my temper and yelled at him. I didn't hurt him or anything, but yelling is no solution, it only makes things worse. After that I felt so bad, I held him close to me and cried and sobbed for a long time. He just stayed there, feeling my pain and helping me go through the hurt. I was disappointed in myself in how I let him down, having not been able to control my anger. And for how it made me treat him differently for the last few days.

This dog is pure love. He didn't hold a grudge, wasn't even fearful of me after my outburst. His behavior hasn't changed. It's as if he knew this crazy yelling person wasn't really me, but someone struggling to find a way to make it better. I am amazed I didn't ruin him. Amazed at how trusting of me he is, and how much he loves me, even when I let him down. I am also ashamed of the way I reacted.

This is the past now. Fresh, but still past. 

Thank you for everyon'es reply, I Have read them all, more than once. And they have helped.

For now the compromise is this : I made a path in the snow, going from the stairs to the back of the yard. It's not a shovelled path, it is too much for me to do. I made the path with my feet, pushing the snow on the sides, and walking back and forth a few times to harden the snow. I put my big boots on, dress warm, put his coat on and we both go outside. I take him to the back or encourage him to come to me. After a bit of coaxing, he will run back and forth a few times, and finally will poop in his favorite area. It doesn't take too long, few minutes top, because I know when he has to go (he doesn't tell me but he shakes when he needs to). 

When in the house, he is either tethered to me or on a leash tied somewhere, so he can't go without me knowing. We have not had any other pee incidents and he still does it anywhere outside. He's particular about his pooping spot only.

Like I said, it's only been one day, but I am grateful for it.


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## glorybeecosta (Nov 11, 2014)

(quote) For now the compromise is this : I made a path in the snow, going from the stairs to the back of the yard. It's not a shovelled path, it is too much for me to do. I made the path with my feet, pushing the snow on the sides, and walking back and forth a few times to harden the snow. I put my big boots on, dress warm, put his coat on and we both go outside. I take him to the back or encourage him to come to me. After a bit of coaxing, he will run back and forth a few times, and finally will poop in his favorite area. 

My Bella is exactly the same she will pee anywhere out side, but had to go to the back of the lot to poop, other wise she will hold it over 2 days, does not go in the house, and will not use Cayenne's potty patch. Must go to the back of the yard


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## peccan (Aug 26, 2014)

Dechi, I'm glad to hear you have something new to try out and that you've found new determination and hope.

If it's any consolation, Sulo showed no sign of telling when he has to go before in the ripe age of 14 months when he began to consistently hang around at the front door and whine when he's needing to go.


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## Shamrockmommy (Aug 16, 2013)

Glad you've come up with another solution. You and Merlin both are very resilient, and I think you'll find a way to work things out. <3


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Update : so far the compromise is working pretty well. I am trying to make going outside fun and I make a big fuss out of it. He likes running in the snow for a little while, but he finds it cold. Tonight he did no 1 and no 2 in under 4 minutes, a total record !

I have to say the pumpkin has been a life saver ! When I don't give a little, he has trouble going or doesn't go. So I make sure he gets 1 tbsp per day or so. He loves the taste of it and can eat it just out of my hand. It is great to give his medication with !


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## Viking Queen (Nov 12, 2014)

Bravo! Good job, both of you!

VQ


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Yesterday Merlin sort of asked to go outside for the first time ! And I wasn't home :-(.

My daughter let her dog, the chihuahua, out the front door, as she is too little to go in the back, too much snow. When he saw that, Merlin ran like crazy towards the back door. My daughter got the hint and let him out in the back. He ran like crazy towards the end of the yard, where he likes to do his pooping. She couldn't see him because he was behind the pool, but he stayed for a while. So I suppose he pooped.

I asked my daughter if she made a big fuss out of it, and she said " not really " but I told him he was a good boy. Now she knows she needs to fuss next time. I was really proud of him !

We had an accident two days ago but I suspect Tamara the chihuahua. This little lady doesn't like the cold and has been having accidents too lately. Which added confusion to the whole Merlin problem because I didn't think she was misbehaving and probably blamed a few of her mishaps on Merlin.


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## Carolinek (Apr 2, 2014)

Sounds like progress to me! Good job with him!


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