# Major Seperation Anxiety



## 94Magna_Tom (Feb 23, 2021)

You said you've had her for a year before moving to a new place. How was her behavior then? What do you mean by scold her? Negative reinforcement generally doesn't teach the dog anything except to be afraid of you.


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## vtt30 (Jul 18, 2021)

94Magna_Tom said:


> You said you've had her for a year before moving to a new place. How was her behavior then? What do you mean by scold her? Negative reinforcement generally doesn't teach the dog anything except to be afraid of you.


Hi Magna_Tom, it took her about 1 month plus or so to be able to be home alone at our previous place, what we did then was just to leave her at home sometimes and let her bark and do whatever she wants.

When she pees ill point to the pee and call her a naughty girl with a stronger tone. We realized when we do that if we try to leave her alone again the barking will be less frequent or she would not bark at all. We dont know if she realizes that we scold her cos of her barking and peeing on the floor or whether she just thinks we are crazy for scolding her. 😢


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## Basil_the_Spoo (Sep 1, 2020)

Have you tried rewarding her with treats?

If you know she cries and barks at 10 minutes, then come back in the house at 8 minutes and reward that. 5 pennies is worth more then a nickle to our poodles, so 3-5 treats one-and-then-another quickly. Consider that the "win" for the day. Try it tomorrow at 10 minutes... see what happens. If you need to come back down, then do so... calibrate and adjust where she's at according to her agenda, not mom/dad's agenda.

Try that.

Make sure you see her pee's outside before you leave so you can set her up for success when she's afraid.


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## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

No, she has no idea why you’re scolding her and it’s quite possible the angry, unpredictable humans are fuelling her anxiety. If scolding makes her quiet, she is probably just shutting down. That’s not going to make any of this better in the long run, and could actually make it much worse.

So let’s take a step back and build up her confidence by explaining to her, in poodle language, what’s expected of her.  And let’s reassure her that the humans are predictable—they will _always_ come home, they will _never_ lash out at her when they do, and they will reward her for making the right choices.

I’d suggest working with a professional who is skilled in modern, positive training methods. If that’s not an option, follow a reputable guide. Advice here can be helpful, but it’s not going to be cohesive. You want something you can follow step-by-step. Here’s one option:






I’ll Be Home Soon – Patricia McConnell


Patricia McConnell, Ph.D., a Certified Applied Animal Behaviorist, has made a lifelong commitment to improving the relationship between people and animals.




www.patriciamcconnell.com





_Dogs who suffer from SA are truly panicked about being home alone: they may soil the house, eat the window molding, howl in misery all day, and/or pant, shake, and drool entire lakes of saliva.

The good news is that this serious and frustrating problem has a very high treatment success. There is no instant cure, but if you follow the recommended training schedule to the letter, most cases are resolved in 6-8 weeks. I’ll Be Home Soon also distinguishes between dogs with SA and dogs who merely misbehave, and then provides a clear, step-by-step behavior modification program to keep your dog happy and your house safe while you’re away._


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## cowpony (Dec 30, 2009)

Something to remember about house soiling is that dogs are naturally inclined to keep their sleeping places clean. They don't like to sleep in their own messes any more than we do. So, when a dog is soiling the house, it's not because the dog thinks it's ok to make a mess inside. You won't get very far by trying to teach a dog that messing in her home is bad. She already understands that, just as you understand not to wet your bed. 

Her environment has changed. She's confused and upset. Imagine if you were sound asleep in bed and a SWAT team kicked in your door. There's a pretty good chance you would pee yourself in your fright. Your dog is operating at that level of upset right now. After the SWAT team left (oops! wrong house!) would it make sense for your loved ones to ignore the fact that you were still pale and shaky and yell at you for ruining the mattress? No. The sensible action would be to quietly clean up the mess and work on getting you back into a routine that made you feel safe again.


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

Seriously?!? You are going about this all wrong. Scolding her for peeing to decrease barking? There isn't a planet in the universe where that makes any sense. You will make things worse more likely than not.

Your dog is very confused by the moving in all likelihood. She needs to feel safe and settled in the new house, not afraid of being yelled at for no apparent reason (in her way of thinking).

Do her a favor and teach her to enjoy a crate as a safe den for when you leave the house. Give her a kong or some other safe chew toy and put a sheet over the crate so she can rest quietly and comfortably. As others pointed out above most dogs won't soil their sleeping spaces. So a crate should stop the peeing. If you just continue as you have doing she is more likely to pee in sneaky hard to find spots.


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## The Popster (Feb 23, 2021)

Like most others here, I agree the 'scold' is not the best idea. Indeed it could make things worse.
The move is a big thing, especially for a young one. Be like going back in time to leaving 'mum' and the breeder home, having to learn what's what and security etc.
Given to understand that Poo's are high on the seperation anxiety scale anyway.
We are working slowly on our little mutt.
Leave her for 5 mins, then 10 mins increase to longer, then back down to shorter time.Mix it up a bit.
1. Dog should be well exercised / tired
2. left with a favorite treat/ toy ( bone - controversial for some ), anything that suggests being left is good actually.
3. According to some, if you can help it, don't make a great fuss when you return - nothing special.

Anyway, this is a voyage we are on, it isn't easy that's for sure.
But no to scolding!!


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## naybaloog (May 19, 2020)

Hey I applaud you for reaching out and seeking advice.

1. Anxiety=fear. Scolding=punishment. Punishment increases fear.... Increasing anxiety.
2. Yes to exercise, yes to a treat when you leave. But do not make this any treat. This treat is only ever available when you leave and it's the coolest treat ever.
3. Find the minimum time your pup can be left alone. Take a timer, leave the house and start the timer. Stop it when your pup barks. Do this at least three times.
4. Practice leaving your dog 30 seconds sooner than the soonest time they barked. So if they started barking at 5 minutes leave for 4 minutes and 30 seconds. Then come back in as long as they are quiet. Walk around the house, praise, then leave to practice again. When she is quiet and successful extend the time A LITTLE BIT.so next time you leave for 5 minutes. If she starts barking you've been gone too long and need to make the time shorter. You want to reinforce calm.

5. It sounds like your pup was able to be left alone so this process shouldn't take long to get her comfortable again. I'd suggest practicing this on the weekend when you have time. Once you're able to get up to 30 minutes of her being alone calmly you should be good to go more extended periods of time.

If you have questions or anything feel free to reach out. Good luck! Be gentle with your dog, she's just scared.


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## For Want of Poodle (Feb 25, 2019)

I really found the reference linked by PTP helpful when I went through seperation anxiety with my dog after a move. 

Definitely no scolding - the key is to make you coming and going no big deal - you are always back before the dog has time to be worried. Break it down and watch when your dog starts showing any signs of anxiety, and start there. It might be when you take the keys out. It might be when you grab a purse. It might be when you touch a door knob. Make those things non-scary by doing them regularly throughout the day, long before you think about actually leaving. 

If you have ever had a panic attack, you know you aren't capable of learning anything in that stage, and the more you have them, the worse the dread of the thing that causes them gets. 

The key with my girl was a full week where I didn't leave her, not even to put the garbage out- if I went out, she came with me or went to doggy daycare. This calmed her down enough (gave her time for the cortisol (stress hormone) to return to normal levels) so that she was capable of learning to be okay with me going. 

I am contrary to other people here - I found a super awesome food treat made it WORSE. Unwanted no emotion at all about me leaving. YMMV, but you will know it isn't working if your dog starts refusing the awesome treat (and other food) as it is a sign bad things are going to happen.


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