# I'm so fed up!



## Michelle

I've been grooming my bf's parents shih tzu for the past year. They wait til the last possible second to get the dog groomed so when she comes to me she is a huge matted mess...her ears, rear end, tail, arm pits, belly...everything! So I spent a good 4 hours grooming her so I could save some of her hair so she wouldn't have to be shaved bald. The hair behind her ears was not able to be saved since it was pulling her skin raw, so I shaved it off with a #10 and it was unnoticeable unless you lifted her ear and investigated (I called his parents and told them and even texted them pictures and they said it was fine). Long story short I went through 4 hours of grooming this unhappy matted dog, went out of my way and made bows for her hair and babysat her for an hour until they could pick her up. And what do I get in return? NOTHING. I don't see myself as a selfish person what so ever, but if they had payed me all the other times why would they think they wouldn't have to this time? I only charge them $20. Am I over reacting?

Here she is before

Chloe before by adayinmylife9, on Flickr

And after (its an old photo but I give her the exact some hair cut everytime). She always shows up super grumpy and by the end she can't stop wagging her tail and smiling.

22/365 All clean by adayinmylife9, on Flickr


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## liljaker

Wow, what a transformation -- good job! That seems rude to me -- did you say somethign to your BF? Maybe he should say something to them, since the are his parents; I would think he would want to if you brought it up to him.


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## Michelle

Usually they give me the money the next day (which I don't mind, I trust them) since its usually my bf picking her up and dropping her off. I was over there that night with his family and they were in love with her hair and were complimenting me saying I should work at a grooming salon ect. But I'm not one to ask for money from other people, I just feel rude. They usually ask how much they owe me so I'm usually not in the position to ask, but they didn't this time so I had my bf ask the next morning and he said that they refuse to pay.


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## liljaker

Michelle said:


> Usually they give me the money the next day (which I don't mind, I trust them) since its usually my bf picking her up and dropping her off. I was over there that night with his family and they were in love with her hair and were complimenting me saying I should work at a grooming salon ect. But I'm not one to ask for money from other people, I just feel rude. They usually ask how much they owe me so I'm usually not in the position to ask, but they didn't this time so I had my bf ask the next morning and he said that they refuse to pay.


Well, you may just be busy the next time they need her groomed, eh?


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## tortoise

Charge $120 up front next time. $60 for this last one they didn't pay for and $60 up front for the next one. You do beautiful work, btw. They're using you, IMO. Your work is as good as a professional, you should get paid the same.

If they use it as an excuse to not get the poor dog groomed at all, call the cops on them.


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## Fond of Poodles

I don't think you're overreacting at all, particularly since they "refuse to pay". It's their loss, you do wonderful work, at a drastically reduced rate compared to other groomers, you saved the coat where other groomers may have just shaved it, you're a good person, . The fault lies with them assuming that because you're dating their son that you're time/skill are not valuable.

I've gone through this with friends and family as well for grooming and computer help. I still never understand the look of surprise and sometimes resentment when I tell them the cost. I do undercharge as well because of the relationship, but I found that people just kept taking advantage of me if I did it for free.

I agree with liljaker and tortoise - I'd be busy next time, or have the price and terms laid out in advance.


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## petitpie

You do a great job with Chloe and the parents are a mess. If you give them gifts for any occasion, use a card instead, hereafter, and give the grooming as a gift.


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## tortoise

petitpie said:


> You do a great job with Chloe and the parents are a mess. If you give them gifts for any occasion, use a card instead, hereafter, and give the grooming as a gift.


with an expiration date!


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## mom24doggies

They refused to pay you?!? Seriously? I would be seeing red at this point...you worked for 4 hours on that dog (she looked beautiful, btw!), dematting and scissoring, you deserve payment. Way more than $20, too. I would sit down and have a good talk with them. Something like this "Either you pay me what I ask, or take Chloe elsewhere so you can pay them 2-3 times as much to shave her."  I understand the whole "family" thing, but there is absolutely no reason for you to allow them to run over you like that. My parents even pay me to groom my mom's Lhasa...usually $60-$100 a month, depending on whether or not I give him a haircut that month. (he's on a 6 wk schedule for haircuts and I bathe him weekly, or as needed.) And there's absolutely no dematting or anything that ever needs to be done on him. The worst thing I have to deal with is greasy beard from the trash can or muddy feet!! IMHO, you should definitely stand up for yourself and say no NOW, because before you know it you'll be doing more and more and more for them, all without any kind of compensation.


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## petitpie

I feel sorry for Chloe who is caught in the middle. Can your bf bring her to you more often for your "gift" cards?


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## Fluffyspoos

I don't reward irresponsible owners that have repeated matted offenses.. #7 everything! They don't realize that those mats are HARMFUL to the dog, and they're totally taking advantage of you. The dogs comfort is not worth a pretty haircut, vanity does not outweigh pain.


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## Countryboy

LOL, Fluffy. '7 everything!' :lol: 

I agree with all of the advice above. And comin' from pros too! 

Not only that . . but they've written it all down . . . where yr bf can read it tonite.


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## tortoise

Fluffyspoos said:


> I don't reward irresponsible owners that have repeated matted offenses.. #7 everything! They don't realize that those mats are HARMFUL to the dog, and they're totally taking advantage of you. The dogs comfort is not worth a pretty haircut, vanity does not outweigh pain.


Wowza! Send me your "#7" clients. Better than a lot of what I get. Ever shave down a newfie with a #15... in reverse?! :argh: They picked up the dog and said "that's shorter than usual" :argh: ya think?! I don't think I will take that dog if they come in this spring.


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## tokipoke

The dog look so happy and beautiful afterwards! What a great groom! It's so hard to be firm with owners like that who don't care, because really the one who suffers is the dog. BUT - either they bring the dog to you and you get taken advantage of, or they take the dog to another groomer and get a #7 all over. The only way to give these types of owners a wake up call is to hit their wallets. Charge accordingly. Charge for your time and labor. I groomed a very large doodle the other day and you bet I charged for my time.


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## faerie

It's a no brainer. Don't groom the dog any more. You're out twenty bucks, but who cares? They're rude to you.


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## idigjars

Hello. Yes it seems rude of your BF's parents. The thing is though, maybe someday they will be your "in laws". Or, do you say "out laws". 

Sometimes just venting can give you some satisfaction instead of keeping it bottled up inside you.

Your grooming skills are terrific. What a transformation. I hope this situation improves for you. Keep a positive attitude. Best regards. Paul


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## Ladywolfe

You are rightfully angry. I am even angry for you. I think "idigjars" is right as far as your response, though.

I wonder if you could safely get out of it by telling them you are not happy with your cut on him (believe me, you did an amazing job--I just mean this as a white-lie, excuse). Tell them you are a perfectionist and, as you have to see him a lot, you would rather someone else do his cut.

Or, your clippers are broken, and you don't have the $$$ (hint) to get them fixed.


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## PaddleAddict

Honey, you are young. Don't start your life out by allowing people to take advantage of you. It can be hard to learn how to stand up for yourself and say no to people, but it's a very important lesson.

You can be polite and nice and friendly and still refuse to let people take advantage of you. In the end, you must have more respect for yourself. 

On a side note, your BF's family does not sound like "good people." I can't believe they expect you to groom their dog for free! Not even a small gift or anything instead of cash? Wow!


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## liljaker

And, IMO, where is the bf in all this? Does he stand up to you? If it were my bf, I'd let him know that either his parents pay me, or he can pay me especially if they expect you to groom the pup in the future.


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## Michelle

liljaker said:


> And, IMO, where is the bf in all this? Does he stand up to you? If it were my bf, I'd let him know that either his parents pay me, or he can pay me especially if they expect you to groom the pup in the future.


He's offended that I'm asking his parents for money. And since they wont pay me, I told him they were rude and taking advantage of me. His response was "they do so much for you, don't even say that about them". What exactly are they doing for me? Inviting me to dinner, inviting me along on family outings, buying me holiday gifts...none of that was ever asked of them but I appreciated it and I do the same for them. 

I'm fed up with him and his family at this point. They've been getting on my nerves the past couple of weeks but this has really just pushed me to my limit. Normally I wouldn't have cared and would of blown it off.


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## liljaker

Michelle: So sorry you are in this quandry.....tough when there is a relationship and family involved.....delicate waters. Live and learn. I would just be busy next time they need a quick clip!


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## petitpie

Justify what his parents give you versus grooming Chloe, or find a new bf. Sounds like a "break" is in order, anyway.


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## Ladyscarletthawk

WTF? Really? I was about to jump outta my chair! It doesnt matter if it was your in laws or your BFs parents. Doesnt seem that they appreciate your hard work to rectify their neglect. Frankly I would be shaving that dog down next time AFTER they pay you a realistic fee plus the 20 bucks you charge them.. Four hours of work equals 100 to me.. and 80 on the low end. Of course that depends on whether you stay with him or not lol.

If you decide to stay with him and you dont want to groom the dog anymore then just tell them so. If they ask why then tell them that it upset you that they didnt wish to pay you that *pittance*, it made you feel unappreciated for all the hardwork you do for their dog and them. Tell them you dont want bad blood so you will remove the situation altogether.. thats why business and pleasure dont mix. If they beg you to groom the dog again, then charge em $25 an hour(if they bring the dog to you on 8wks schedule) so that will cover any crankiness and neglect the dog suffers from.. paid upfront. If they take care of it they should pay no more than 50. And IF they wanna be slick and bring the dog in less often then charge an additional 5 per 2wks over per hour:alien2:.. Just sayin:angel:


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## Fluffyspoos

I'm in the same boat in a way. Normally I would charge $50+ for grooming standard poodles, and that's just a base clip. Friends of mine got a puppy and I've been grooming her, they asked how much I would charge them, and I decided I would charge them the amount that I would be paid if I were getting commission (since I wouldn't be doing her at work.)

Lately I've been trading grooms for massages the wife does since they have a young baby and only the husband is working. Problem is.. the wife charges $1 per minute with her massages, and since I'm only charging them $25 she thinks she should only do 25 minute massages, even though I'm HALVING the price for them and it takes me 2 and a half hours to start and finish the dog.

This last clip I did on their girl, Jetta, I would've charged at least $65, and she looked bombin'. I'm too much of a chicken to approach her and tell her she's taking advantage of me, since I don't NEED massages, but they DO need their dog groomed. I'm doing them a favor by trading services instead of charging them.

We'll see how things happen the next time she needs groomed.. this is also the puppy I took to get her rabies and scheduled her spay because the wife is too busy to drive to the vet 5 mins away and do it herself. Too busy.. not working.


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## petitpie

If trading services (or favors) doesn't feel right, then speak up or move on.


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## Ladyscarletthawk

I agree with petitpie..

Fluffy I have a coworker that does some grooms on the side as well and only charges half of what we do at work. She does amazing grooms too.. IMO, there is no reason to groom outside of work for the same amount of pay in your spare time.. if that is the case they should come to your salon. In reality whether they come to you or you them you should be charging MORE than your salon would. Why? Because not only are you doing an express groom ie one on one with your sole focus on the one dog, but also you can get the dog done sooner. Lets also think about the extra cleaning to YOUR home you have to do.. or if you go there the extra time, mileage, wear and tear on your car, and all the hauling of you stuff to and fro. Also it is a better, quieter, less stressfull environment for the pet... just like a mobile groomer would be :aetsch:. Soo if it were me I would probably charge 75 for a fairly basic groom on a std, if I were grooming at home.. just sayin:angel2:. Then maybe you could get a stinkin decent massage lol. 

If I were you I would tell her you cant groom her dog on your spare time for so lil anymore, so may be best if you dont groom her dog anymore.. YOu never know she may offer to pay you more, in which case you can charge her what you and your service is really worth. if you choose to get 75 or 75 min of massage, well that up to you .


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## grab

I would not groom the dog anymore, sad as that may be. Perhaps paying double the cost at a groomer will cause them to realize what a deal they've gotten.

I'd perhaps ask the boyfriend if he'd work a job for four hours with no pay. That you're doing the work on your free time doesn't lessen the time put in.


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## faerie

Fluffy: retail for retail. A groom is $xxx. You'll do it for them for half price cash or straight trade of an hour massage (and table massage at that!)


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## Olie

Michelle, if you continue to groom them...insist you are paid up front and I would increase my price. They will pay triple that to go elsewhere. 

For some reason his parents do not appreciate you, thats an issue in itself. 

The groom looks great.


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## Michelle

With persistence I finally got paid. Only took a week...:argh:

I'm going to make them pay upfront from now on if I even decide to groom Chloe, like you guys suggested.


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## tokipoke

Good for you! Hope you increase your price though. I tell my friends and aquaintances right from the beginning what I charge. My husband doesn't think I charge them enough, haha. I know some groomers will charge friends a four week groom price no matter the condition of the dog.


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## Ladyscarletthawk

Michelle said:


> With persistence I finally got paid. Only took a week...:argh:
> 
> I'm going to make them pay upfront from now on if I even decide to groom Chloe, like you guys suggested.


Good for you!!! But charge them appropriately not 20 bucks! That way its in their court.. if they want to pay you what you deserve to groom their dog theyll pay it or go elsewhere.. either way its THEIR choice them !


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## georgiapeach

Family relationships can be very tricky. For some reason, family feels like they shouldn't have to pay a family member. This family is definitely taking advantage of you! I pay $50 to get the clip shown in my signature (just a pet clip), which is why I learned to do it myself. I know it's not as good as a professional groom, but the clippers paid for themselves after 3 grooms, so I save myself $50 every 3-4 weeks!

Stick to your guns, and yes, CHARGE MORE!! You do a great job, especially considering the fact that the dog is matted. When I use to pay the groomer to groom Potsie, I always brushed and combed him before taking him for grooming. I would have been mortified if he was matted!


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## GlennBaxterFamily

Family .. they suck sometimes!

We have a great groomer. We love her but more importantly the dogs love her! We take two Shih Tzu and a Minature Schnauzer to her. She charges $45 per dog and we pay her a $15 tip, per dog. We know it is a steal to get them groomed for that price. We take them in every 4 weeks.

We made the mistake when we first got the Shih Tzu's of not brushing them enough and they ended up with mats. We actually cut out the mats that we could so it was not so much work for her. We suggested that she just shave them down, but she did not. They looked great when she was done. Now we make sure to brush them every single night. We also make sure to give them a bath the day before we take them in to her .. we are weird like that though lol

Stand your ground. People who are going to take advantage of you will continue to do so as long as *you* let them!


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## Carley's Mom

I was paying $45 to get that same cut on my shih tuz, plus a tip. I saw your post and thought I do Carley, why not do a shih tuz as well. I don't think mine looks as good a Choe, but it sure was cheap. Charge at least $45 next time and make them pay before you groom the dog.


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## Ladywolfe

My gosh, I almost made a WRONG post, due to my old eyes. I would have sworn that GlenBaxterFamily posted that they were paying $145 plus tips................hahaha

Glad I deleted that post. LOL


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## GlennBaxterFamily

Ladywolfe said:


> My gosh, I almost made a WRONG post, due to my old eyes. I would have sworn that GlenBaxterFamily posted that they were paying $145 plus tips................hahaha
> 
> Glad I deleted that post. LOL


Ha ha I could not afford to pay that much per dog!!! Here is a picutre of Tate before his first groom and after. Again it was $45 and I tipped her $15 so $60 total per dog.


















This was the after from last week.


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## tokipoke

Your dogs look so sweet! I love grooming schnauzers!


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## CT Girl

GBfamily your groomer does a great job and your dogs are very cute. Love the bow.


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