# no licking! and general puppy questions



## Irispup (Jul 29, 2017)

Hi all! We've had our 11 week old spoo, Iris, for a few weeks now. So far we've made big strides in bell training, she can do several tricks, sleeps through the night... but we're working on a few other issues. First, she does not lick! Not our face, rarely our hands, nothin! Is this normal? Or at least not abnormal? My husband hates licky dogs so he is thrilled. We're also struggling with the super bitey phase. I might be having more of an issue with the people around us! Iris does not like to be held if she is super fired up and if held against her will she will turn her head around and snap at you, not in a vicious way, but we've had several friends come over and want to snuggle her and when she bites they act shocked, then go back for more, as if to say hey puppy I want to cuddle so let's try this again. A family member got bit by her yesterday and also acted shocked! She was playing hard with their adult dog, and my family member reached down to pet her mid play so she bit, they too went back for more petting and she bit again, so they held her down! I was really bothered. They figured if that worked for their pup it should work for ours. I know it's a bummer when a cute puppy doesn't want to cuddle but I'm growing frustrated with family and friends who won't listen! 

She's definitely improving on biting and generally will "go get a toy" unless she is in maniac mode in which case she goes to a very short time out in her x pen. I just need reassurance she will turn out ok! We're doing positive reinforcement, not pushing her, etc. I just worry!


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## Searcher (Aug 7, 2009)

You need to protect your puppy! She is giving signals that she needs space. Don't let others countermand your training or make her fearful. 

Dogs generally don't like to be held tight -- they need to learn to tolerate it (in small steps) if that is what YOU would like. 

Also, although training is going well, she really doesn't know commands yet. Don't worry about whether she is a licker or not, especially if it is a behavior you don't want. Just be glad it isn't one of the many things you have to deal with.


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

Dogs mostly hate being hugged and patted on the top of the head. Also a puppy that is very charged up is not going to settle because someone wants to cuddle them. If unhappy about being restrained under that kind of situation I am not surprised that Iris bit someone. You need to educate the person who did this to not interfere in your training of your puppy unless they can follow your rules.

Personally both of my poodles are insane lickers and although I don't mind a bit of licking on my hand I don't appreciate being licked on my neck (a Javelin favorite) or having Lily trying to give me a bath on any bare skin surface she happens to be able to reach. I would gladly trade you on that trait.

It sounds like you are doing just fine. And Iris' behavior sounds like pretty normal puppy stuff.


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## zooeysmom (Jan 3, 2014)

Yes, please listen to what Iris is communicating! She's been trying to tell you and your guests she does not like tight restraint/cuddles and you need to protect her, as Searcher said, from your family/guests. I honestly don't care about offending anyone when it comes to protecting my dogs. I don't care if people think I'm bossy, weird, uptight, whatever. I'm their mom and I protect them, and they trust me for it. 

Some spoos are big lickers and some aren't. I've seen the full gamut.


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

I will add that although it is ideal for all dogs to have total trust in their people I do so many really complex things with my dogs that are totally based on their trusting me truly and deeply I have even had moments where I have asked my BF (who co owns them with me) not to do certain kinds of corrections of bad behaviors in our house because I didn't want them ever to doubt either of us in any way. He is not a bad handler (in fact he was an awesome puppy raiser for Lily and Peeves since he wasn't working when they were young), but he is not a performance handler and there are some things he corrects in ways I think would interfere with my training.

Our most important job is to keep our dogs safe and confident so they can handle the complexities of life with ease.


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## lisasgirl (May 27, 2010)

Sounds like you need to do a little training on your houseguests! If they try to touch and hold the puppy when she doesn't want it, they lose access to the puppy. Just like you put Iris in a timeout to calm down when she won't listen.  I would say that means either you ask them to move away or, if they won't listen, you put Iris in her X-pen when they're around.

Remember, this is socialization time - you want all her experiences with people and their hands/touch to be positive. This kind of thing could potentially give her a complex about being handled, and you don't want that.

As for the licking, I agree that you're lucky! Archie is an obsessive licker, especially if he's worked up about something. It's cute sometimes but it gets a bit old.


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## zooeysmom (Jan 3, 2014)

lily cd re said:


> I will add that although it is ideal for all dogs to have total trust in their people I do so many really complex things with my dogs that are totally based on their trusting me truly and deeply I have even had moments where I have asked my BF (who co owns them with me) not to do certain kinds of corrections of bad behaviors in our house because I didn't want them ever to doubt either of us in any way. He is not a bad handler (in fact he was an awesome puppy raiser for Lily and Peeves since he wasn't working when they were young), but he is not a performance handler and there are some things he corrects in ways I think would interfere with my training.
> 
> *Our most important job is to keep our dogs safe and confident so they can handle the complexities of life with ease*.


Good point--you want to protect them to a point, but not be totally neurotic about the way other people handle them, as long as they are respecting the dog.


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## Beautiful Blue (Apr 24, 2017)

With the children, when first meeting our dog, we like to let them sit on the floor or on the couch and let the dog come to them if he wants. They can speak and gesture encouragement to him to come, offer a treat, but it's up to him. He's kind of stand-offish until he knows you better. 

And this is large Rio!!! Imagine a young pup who can be picked up against her will and made to deal directly with folks she may not know. I'm trying to remember what an 11 week old standard was like - size and behaviour.... do they really need to be picked up much at all? 

I discouraged licking with my dogs. They ended up giving little "air kisses" - kind of sweet.


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## Irispup (Jul 29, 2017)

Great advice from all of you! After the first couple of times we've definitely been telling friends and family that what they're doing is not ok. I just really really want to raise a well adjusted dog who won't bite when annoyed so it makes me a bit nervous that she's so snappy but I know that puppies are crazy and have to learn manners!


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## glorybeecosta (Nov 11, 2014)

I have 3 toys and 2 will lick you to death and the other would not think of licking you. The other 2 give kisses, the 3rd has kissed me 2 times in a year, but she is a cuddle bug, must no licking or kissing


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