# Ever been shamed or shunned for buying vs rescuing?



## LauraRose (Dec 26, 2012)

I think I've mentioned that I'm brand new to this whole well-bred, issue-free dog guardianship thing. 
I've always had rescues, & most of them were Dobermans,exclusively from 1998-2013. 

Anyhow, I'm transitioning gratefully to the size, temperament, energy level, etc etc of my Mini love, Lula. (Though, I confess I do not always appreciate that people now want to approach me & ask to pet her constantly. I know - that's my issue, not hers, so I tolerate the fawning. I'm used to people crossing the street despite my gentle Dobe's well-trained manners.)

The thing is though, I never considered that people might discriminate against me (& Lula?) for her being purchased, rather than rescued. Obviously, I Don't condone or support BYB in any way - Lula is an Aery Poodle & I did my research. But even after certain people have learned she's from a reputable source, I've definitely felt a strange shunning or shaming in not having rescued. 

Specifically, I'm thinking of our training class, where Lula is the only non-rescue & many of our dog park visits. I actually think our trainer may be discriminant of all non-rescues & perhaps Poodles, in general. She often singles Lula out, calling her "Poodle", rather than by name; she hasn't done this with any other dog, most of which are obvious pure-breeds, albeit rescues. 

Just wondering if any of you have experienced this? If so, how have you responded?


P.S.
I've also considered the possibility that it's all in my head & I just feel guilty about buying a dog when I know I could have easily rescued, but I thought this choice through long & hard before I began researching breeders. & I've not waivered one drop since making this choice for myself, & for Lula. I am so thoroughly happy with her, & the simple knowledge of her past, I honestly don't think it's subconscious guilt. Besides, I still volunteer with Dobe rescue...


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## cowpony (Dec 30, 2009)

Poodle snobs look down their noses at me because I've got parti pups. Rescue snobs look down their noses at me because I bought my pups. My Indian neighbors fear me because I've got 60 pound pups. My pitbull owning neighbor laughs at me because I've got foo foo pups. My money conscious friend lectures me because I buy expensive natural dog food instead of normal supermarket food. My new age friend lectures me because I feed kibble instead of raw.

Meh. No matter what I do, someone is gonna look down on me. Might as well just please myself and not worry about it.


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## Abbe gails Mom (Nov 8, 2012)

Wow, never in my life did I think of such a thing. All of mine are rescues, that is not for everyone, neather is paying for one from a breeder, they All need forever homes, love and care.And as to anyone looking down on eather of you, I say to Hell with them, It"s your dogs your life, do it your way, and if no one likes it, so what.Shame, on hateful people.


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## Sookster (Apr 11, 2011)

Cowpony, that was absolutely beautifully said! 

LauraRose, yes. I'm in with a crowd of trainers that primarily deal with rescue and I just got a beautiful, well bred parti pup from one of the best breeders around and I can't tell you how much flack I've gotten from some of them! "I can't believe you are getting a dog from a breeder", "you can get perfectly nice dogs in rescue", "ugh! and a PARTI! That's makes it even worse!". All things that were said to me. 

In fact, I did try the rescue route. I ended up with a perfectly nice dog that was a terrible fit for me. I could not find the kind of poodle with the personality that I was looking for in a rescue. You are incorrect, you probably couldn't have gotten the dog you wanted in a rescue either. Poodles are (thankfully) hard to find in rescue. Poodles without "issues" (health or behavioral) are even harder to find. Yes, they are out there, but there aren't many. It's not like if you were looking for a pit bull or a lab mix, which are a dime a dozen in shelters. 

I embrace the fact that I have a happy, healthy, beautiful boy that I can do all the things I want to do with and I say to hell with everyone else. Like cowpony said, there are a lot of other things I take flack about, too. 

PS: My agility instructor always refers to my dog (whichever one I have in class) as "Poodle" and she means no ill will. She's a breeder of Swedish Valhunds herself and appreciates a well-bred dog. I think poodles are just so distinctive in their personality and movement that it's just natural to refer to them as "poodle" rather than "dog".


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## Qarza (Feb 23, 2013)

Thankfully I don't get that here in NZ but I do get snickers from my friends. The tolerate my dogs for my sake. They do not understand that my dogs are my life. I have to have poodles because I am allergic to dogs and I need a dog or two in my life. I have had dogs all my life. Poodles would never show up in a rescue or if they did they would be snapped up so quickly you would never know.
I say just be proud of your Lulu and remember she was made for you and you for her. If someone asks why you didn't get a rescue tell them it is really none of their business. If they are rude enough to ask, they deserve a rude answer.


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## 3dogs (Nov 3, 2010)

I have had no issues at all. I have both in my house & they are all loved just the same. The dogs that I purchased were for a very specific reason & it has worked out well. My 1 Spoo rescue was also for a specific purpose & I did reject other poodles there. The right Spoo found us. 

I am glad I don't have "friends" like that because they wouldn't be for very long. My dog trainers have all sorts, pure, mixes, rescue, purchased, breeders. All sorts of trainers & never have I had an issue. I think you should find another trainer.


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## Indiana (Sep 11, 2011)

I've never been criticised for having poodles, although mine aren't stellar quality like some of yours (but they aren't rescues either). In fact, I keep getting asked to bring my dogs in to work, everyone loves them. Because I worked for the city (still do, but different city) I got my other dogs from rescue; an officer kept bringing me impounded dogs to the office once word got out I was interested, until he brought the ones I couldn't say no to  All of us who worked there got our dogs that way! I adopted a cat from the pound too, and still have her. I've never understood the judgemental attitude some people have...are they that way about people who have their own vs. adopting babies too? How about eating meat? I mean come on! There are many ways to help others on this planet and one way is not everyone else's way.


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## outwest (May 1, 2011)

I have almost always purchased purebred dogs from reputable breeders. I do not feel guilty. It is not my fault that others are irresponsible. I love my dogs as much as anyone else who rescues theirs. Dogs are with you for a long, long time. In order to fit with my house and family, I want to have some say in their personalities, abilities and yes, their looks. I take good care of my pets. Nope, I don't feel guilty one bit.

The only person who can make you feel guilty is yourself. Don't let others make you feel that way. I bet you that your dog is taken care of as well or better than any of theirs.  Just look at your poodle and ask yourself if you would rather have chosen another dog. I bet the answer is no.


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## LauraRose (Dec 26, 2012)

cowpony said:


> Poodle snobs look down their noses at me because I've got parti pups. Rescue snobs look down their noses at me because I bought my pups. My Indian neighbors fear me because I've got 60 pound pups. My pitbull owning neighbor laughs at me because I've got foo foo pups. My money conscious friend lectures me because I buy expensive natural dog food instead of normal supermarket food. My new age friend lectures me because I feed kibble instead of raw.
> 
> Meh. No matter what I do, someone is gonna look down on me. Might as well just please myself and not worry about it.


In one post, I've fallen in like with you. 


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## Fluffyspoos (Aug 11, 2009)

I only bought one of my dogs, Vegas, from a reputable breeder, Cairo and Vienna were rescues, but from BYBs. The difference is huge! I'll never judge anyone from buying from a reputable breeder or rescue, but I will give someone dirty looks from buying from a BYB person, not going to lie!

The people that rescue only have their hearts in the right place, but they have to realize we may want a dog that we know isn't, or is very unlikely, going to suffer from genetic or behavior issues.


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## MollyMuiMa (Oct 13, 2012)

Cowpony just about covered the whole matter!! Love it and agree!


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## outwest (May 1, 2011)

Me, too! Cowpony, great post.


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## LauraRose (Dec 26, 2012)

outwest said:


> The only person who can make you feel guilty is yourself. Don't let others make you feel that way. I bet you that your dog is taken care of as well or better than any of theirs.  Just look at your poodle and ask yourself if you would rather have chosen another dog. I bet the answer is no.



Thank you. 

Thank you, All. 


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## Poodlelvr (Mar 13, 2010)

Deciding to get a dog if you are a responsible person is a multi year commitment. No one should criticize you for your choice. Having decided to be totally responsible for the next 15+ years there is no need to defend yourself. I have gotten my poodles from all kinds of sources over the years. With hard earned wisdom I try to make the best choices for myself and my dogs.


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## Amalthea (Apr 13, 2013)

When I was considering a Poodle from a breeder, I struggled with the decision. I've always had and supported rescue dogs.

However, I have no problem getting any dog from a reputable breeder. Breeding should be the best to the best only. I do have a problem with buying a dog from a BYB, pet store or otherwise crappy breeder. And yes, I judge for that.


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## Toy poodlelvr (Mar 24, 2013)

LauraRose said:


> I think I've mentioned that I'm brand new to this whole well-bred, issue-free dog guardianship thing.
> I've always had rescues, & most of them were Dobermans,exclusively from 1998-2013.
> 
> Anyhow, I'm transitioning gratefully to the size, temperament, energy level, etc etc of my Mini love, Lula. (Though, I confess I do not always appreciate that people now want to approach me & ask to pet her constantly. I know - that's my issue, not hers, so I tolerate the fawning. I'm used to people crossing the street despite my gentle Dobe's well-trained manners.)
> ...


Well maybe THAT person or trainer is jealous of you getting a very beautiful dog or theyDon't have enough money so they are jealous...


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## Carley's Mom (Oct 30, 2011)

I am a rescue believer too. I have not purchased a puppy since I was 22 years old and sadly, it was a byb. The only other pup I ever purchased came from a pet store! I did not know any better and was a teenager at the time, carrying around my senior week beach money...lol I did not go to the beach.

But when I learned about rescue that was the route I took from then on. I have gotten wonderful dogs from the pound,( purebreed Boxers, a cute little mutt) I got both my shih tuz's from re-homers, but when I decided I wanted a spoo I ran into trouble. I tried, I really did , I knew every dog on Petfinders my name in my search. I wanted an adult dog, but could not find a fit for my elderly shih tuzs and my 2 year old grandson . So I was going to go with a pup ,even though that was not what I wanted. The rescue did not even bother to get back to me, I tried over and over... So I ended up with my dream dog," Carley". She was a retired breeding bitch from a great breeder. Stella was a return to the same breeder and I got her for free because of the relationship I now have with the breeder and the trust she had in me to give the dog a great home.

We all have to do what works best us. Yay for anyone that can rescue and stop all the breeding that goes on , but it is not always possible. Just love the dog you have and don't worry about it.


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## MTWaggin (Nov 17, 2010)

Oh yeah, been there done that - have that issue especially around here in a certain agility venue. That said, I very frankly tell everyone that I do indeed have rescues (and have had) AND I do foster work so frankly they have no place to put me down about my well bred dogs. I add as well that at this point in my life I want as much of a known quantity as I can get in a new dog....temperment, drive, health etc....you don't get that with rescues. I've paid my dues and still do with my fostering (which many of those people don't do), where I find most of those "passing judgement" don't. I don't belittle them for HAVING a rescue and I expect the same in return.


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## Luce (Mar 4, 2013)

I guess Luce falls into the category of being from a BYB!! 

We had been discussing another pet since my bird died in January, and the house seemed so empty. I was ready for another............bird!!

I met my neighbor (moved into her uncles house with her fiance and 2 dogs - male and female mpoo) in Feb while she was looking for her male mpoo. He escaped through the fence. She mentioned she had a litter of pups and the pregnancy was unplanned. Before she moved here, she had the male with her and the female was in heat and living with her mother. She thought the female was done but obviously she wasn't.

I told Glenn if we were to get a dog, I wanted a poodle. My housekeeping abilities will not give me a photo spread in House Beautiful so a non shedding dog is of the most important quality for me - cuteness is up there also lol. 

For me it was convenience - right next door! I met the parent dogs and believe the young lady did not intend for the female to have a litter at this time. The pups needed homes regardless of the circumstance of how they came to be. The young lady is now pregnant herself so I am sure she will not let them mate again for a while. I have spoken with her about how she is going to stop it from happening and believe she has good intentions and a fairly good plan.

As for the trainer?? Our trainer LOVES Luce!!!! There was also a pure bred husky and a rescue g shepherd/lab mix. So our little class of 3 pups had it all! If anything the trainer was more enthralled with Luce then the others. She was the smallest at just over 2 lbs. when class started - and short! And the trainers Mom had poodles for years so she knows about their intelligence and what great dogs they are.

I tried to go through the rescues - since Glenn is disabled and has a chronic pain condition I don't want people snooping in my house and have to sign a contract I may have issues with. I tried getting an adult from people who no longer want their dog for whatever reason - Craigs list - not one person called me or contacted me in any way shape or form. From the local shelter? There weren't any. I have donated to the aspca in my city, I have donated money for dogs through Petco when I had a bird! 

If my finances were different I think I would have gone through a breeder. I have seen stories on Animal Planet shows concerning the problems dogs get from bad breeding and quite frankly I can't afford a pet with a laundry list of medical/behavior issues due to bad breeding. Is it possible for Luce to have some issues because of bad breeding? Yes it is! But the price and convenience makes it worth the risk. 

Luce was and is meant to be with us and that's the way it is.


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## N2Mischief (Dec 3, 2012)

I had one pug, my first, bought from a reputable breeder. After that I had rescues till Stogy, my JRT. Then more rescues, including my Isabel. When Isabel was killed by an unpredictable rescued pit bull. I felt after so many medical problems and bills with Isabel and then to have her die in such a horrific way because of another rescue, it was time for a well bred, healthy, predictable dog. 

I had a post on my facebook page yesterday, it showed a sad looking mixed breed, and said, "As long as there are dogs dying in shelters, there is no such thing as a responsible breeder". I didn't comment, I didn't want to get into an argument with all the rescue people out there. But it really angered me! Why should I have to clean up after these people over and over and over?


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## sarahmurphy (Mar 22, 2012)

We happen to be so lucky to have one in the family who was purchased from a wonderful breeder, and one who was donated by another wonderful breeder to a service program and released, who ended up "rescued" by my Sister in Law. 

Everyone has an "ohhhh" for one of them, you are just never sure which one.

It's all about spin control...

I mean, I did rescue mine from a life of smothering kisses and rural farm life, and more frequent grooming than he likes! I'm sure that breeder would have spoiled him rotten if she had kept him there - with several acres of fenced back yard, the fetch time could be endless! They even have a little pond thing - someone home all the time, a few other poodles to play with, and his Mom..... I sure am glad I saved him from that life!


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## Marcie (Aug 2, 2011)

I volunteer at Poodle Rescue of Houston and the woman that started this organization owns a boarding kennel and breeds standard poodles as well. There is no shame in rescuing or purchasing a dog from a reputable breeder. 

The only shame is if the dog you rescue or purchase is not cared for properly.


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