# Puppy Switch - A hard but right decision



## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

Well, after 3 weeks with Bingo in our lives, I had to make the hard decision to return him to the breeder and choose another puppy. 
I wanted a puppy/dog as a companion when my husband is working long hours and a friend for my children. Well, Bingo wasn't built that way. He was an extremely active, VERY confident dog who didn't really "need" us. His jumping and biting at the children got so bad that they stayed upstairs to avoid him. Corrections led to him lunging at us to bite again. Ignoring him led to him jumping up and biting our knees. He started stalking toys and even stalked me once. We'll be getting laying hens soon and I knew that having chickens around him was going to be a bad thing. 
The worst thing was that he didn't enjoy being petted and loved on. He'd nip and squirm to get away. He liked to sleep in a different room instead of near us when we'd watch TV at night. He hated being in his crate or penned up in any way and would bark for 30 minutes straight if confined. 
He also started picking and choosing when to do his "tricks" depending on if I had a good enough treat or if he was interested. 

I realized that we just weren't the right family for Bingo. I'm sure there's a more experienced family out there that can give him what he needs. The breeder was fantastic and asked us to bring him back asap so the bad habits he was picking up wouldn't continue. 

It was sad saying goodbye to him because part of me feels like I failed him. She assured me that she'll be able to find him the right home. I left him with his favorite toy and his chewy. 

The happy ending to my hard tale is that she had a little, submissive but very happy little girl puppy that came home with me.  She was the smallest in the litter and was often picked on by her littermates. Her tail wags non stop and she loves to give kisses and sleep on our laps. She's gentle and eager to please... cautious but happy to meet new people. We've only had her for 2 days but she's already a part of her family in a way that our Bingo wasn't able to be. 

So, now we're back to the beginning with a puppy but I know we've finally found the right puppy for our family.


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## sweetheartsrodeo (Sep 19, 2012)

I just love a happy ending


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## blacky55667 (Dec 29, 2013)

this happened to me too... Our first was a overly confident dominate pup. He was friendly... when he wanted to be. When he thought he didn't want to be touched, grrrrr *bares teeth*... SNAP! He was a humper and a marker too! Hated men and disliked everyone but me (and even me he only liked at times). The breeder suggested trading so we did. The breeder took the dominate dog and is now showing him (i don't like the idea of him breeding and making more dominate dogs but hes not mine anymore). The breeder was great through the whole thing as she says 'I want everyone to have the dog that they want'. We figured she would steer clear of us because we are so difficult, but she kept following up with us, shes a wonderful breeder! Our new dog is Teddy is great despite the first day he bit me from fear! He was so scared that just banging on the floor next to him was enough to let him bite and scream. Hes gotten over most of his fears and now hes a wounderful little baby.


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## blacky55667 (Dec 29, 2013)

Its really weird how our story's are ALOT alike! I felt like i failed him, we got the submissive runt, etc

I just realized your in NC too lol!


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## DreamAgility (Sep 2, 2013)

Awe, I'm so sorry! I wouldn't have been able to do that. From day 1 Dreamer n I were attached. Hope to see jew pictures of the little girl!
Whose your breeder? Dreamers breeder is retired now and I m collecting names.


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## patk (Jun 13, 2013)

good decision and good breeder. congratulations on your good judgment in picking that breeder in the first place - and now you have the dog you really wanted, too!


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## Manxcat (May 6, 2013)

Hard, hard decision for you but definitely the right one. We should have chosen a quieter pup than Pippin, but didn't really know any better, and as she is so like my old tpoo from when I was a girl I kind of thought all toy poodles were like this - full on, challenging, dominant (if we let her), snarky and not really into lots of cuddles unless she feels like it. Of course, we love her to bits despite all that, but it has been hard.

Good luck with your new little girl, I hope everything works out really well for you


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## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

Thanks all. Yes, it was a hard, tear-filled decision but once I made the decision, I felt like the weight of the world was off my chest. I hadn't been able to connect with Bingo because I felt like it was constant battle with him. 

My breeder is Family Affair Standards  They really know their puppies... even though they are a larger scale breeder. 

I'll share some pictures as soon as my allergy headache goes away.


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## MollyMuiMa (Oct 13, 2012)

So glad you made the decision before the pup got too old! I remember how conflicted you were! SOOOOOO what did you name your new little girl? Just remember to be 'soft' with her cuz if she is a gentle puppy, she will be sensitive to roughness and loudness!


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## srshaffers (Jul 24, 2013)

*Becky M*

My breeder is Family Affair Standard Poodles too! I love them! They really do know their puppies and dogs and want to make everyone happy. Yes they do breed a lot of dogs but they take care of them really well and really know what they are doing. I couldn't be more impressed with them!

Becky M, was your puppy that you returned "Bingo" from Paris and Eli's litter by chance? And what color was he? 

Also, what litter is your new puppy from and what color is she?

My puppy I just got on December 31, 2013. She is white and was born October 30, 2013. She is from Paris and Eli's litter. She is really dominant and very confident. She does the same things as "Bingo" does, but I have been really working with her and she is now listening and turning out to be fantastic! I have been taking her to puppy classes as well. She is way too smart for her own good! Lol! Also, my other dog who is a 9 year old Tamaskan is really teaching her some respect. LOL! I've been working with her around my niece and nephew as well. I keep her on a leash and really correct her when she jumps and nips. She no longer does any of those things anymore! Yay! But it did take a lot of consistent training and lots of energy on my part to really nip those behaviors in the bud. You definitely made the right decision on switching for a different puppy especially since you seemed like you didn't want to spend all that time training her. 

I am really looking forward to seeing pictures of your new puppy! I definitely will be getting another Standard Poodle from Family Affair Standard Poodles in the near future! 

Congrats!!

Oh, my puppy's name is Summit. What did you name yours?


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## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

srshaffers, Bingo is from Skyler and Kirby's litter, born 11-19. He's black with a white spot on his chin and chest. 
Polly is from Oreo and Eli's litter. She's a parti apricot. Our pups are half sisters  Sounds like you're much more able to handle a confident pup! I wish I had a strong older dog that could have helped with Bingo too. He plowed right over my mom's 2 jack Russell mixes. He ignored all of their attempts to correct him. 

So, our little girl's name is Pollyanna (Polly for short). She's 8 weeks old today and is 7.5 lbs. She checked out great at the vet yesterday. I think the vet was a little disappointed in us for changing puppies but hopefully he'll see over time that we're responsible owners. We've recently moved so it's a new vet and this is our visit pet with them. 

So, here is Polly. She's really coming out of her shell and is adorably playful but still gentle and snuggly. 








See the tail going? Her waggily tail is so cute! We all adore her! The kids love that they have a puppy who they can play with now.


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## Chagall's mom (Jan 9, 2010)

Congratulations on pretty little Polly! I love her name. I'm so happy your family has a poodle pup to love! It had to be very tough, but you acted responsibly in returning Bingo to the breeder so he could have a fresh start and go on to be a good canine citizen with someone in a position to give him what he needs. _Thank you_ for letting us know about him! Try to be comforted by knowing Bingo will likely have a wonderful life, and you hit the "jackpot" with sweet Polly! Anyone following your threads knows you're committed to training your pups and they are full-fledged members of your family. I'm glad your children have such a sweet-natured fur-sibling. Enjoy life with Polly, and please keep sharing pictures and stories.


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## kathy09 (Jan 14, 2009)

She is beautiful and she looks so cuddly. I love her name too.


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## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

Chagall's Mom, I can't thank you enough for your kind words. That really means a lot that you could tell how committed I was to do right by Bingo. I really did try my hardest with Bingo. I read/watched anything I could on training and sought out help anywhere I could. We're just not the right family for him. The breeder is going to let me know when he gets the right family and she's going to tell anyone interested in him about our experience so they're ready for him. She said she thought he'd make a great hunter or agility dog. He'll do well if he has a "job".  

With Polly I don't feel as panicked to teach her a million things right away. (that was the only way I felt like I could manage Bingo). With Polly, we can just enjoy her and train her as we go along. Much less stress for all involved.


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## Lily's-Mom (May 31, 2012)

Sounds like you did the right thing for all involved. Bingo needed more stimulation or a job to do and someone will be able to work with him. Polly looks like a sweetie. So pretty. I love a snuggly dog. That tail wagging pic speaks volumes.


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## Poodlebeguiled (May 27, 2013)

Sorry I'm so late to this thread. That had to be a really tough decision and I'm sorry it didn't work out with Bingo. But it was good that you returned him quickly while he's still young and someone will be out there who can work with his driviness. Some dogs are just more difficult than others to motivate. It sounds like he is just over the top independent.

Polly sounds perfect for what you need....responsive, playful and cuddly. Perfect. I'm glad for you that the breeder was able to supply you with this puppy with such a vastly different temperament. They sure do come in all kinds don't they. 

I love your pictures... she's adorable. Enjoy! Yes, and don't forget to keep us in the know on how she's coming along. And lots of pictures. Very happy for you.


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## Chells_Aura (Dec 7, 2012)

Wow that must have been hard! I'm glad things worked out happily in the end!
Polly is adorable! If you are up for it you should partake in the 52 weeks of... challenge in photos! It's a great way to keep track of a puppy's growth... and make sure you have enough pictures to remember this time by!
(also I'm sure everyone here would love the weekly updates!)


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## hilshaven (Sep 20, 2012)

Polly is absolutely adorable! I am sure Bingo will find his perfect match too! I think my Winston is a cross between both of them;-). He can be a little rambunctious and kolohe (rascal), but he can also be the wild child and jump and hump :-( Fortunately my hubby is a much better dog trainer than I and I am learning. 

I am so happy you found Polly. She seems like the perfect match for you! So happy for her and your family.


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## hilshaven (Sep 20, 2012)

I meant to also say that Winston does have his sweet and loving side. I love him to pieces! And he loves us very much! He watches for us when we come home. Fortunately my hubby is home in the day. Winston is so happy to see anyone who "comes home".


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## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

Look at how comfortable my sweet girl is getting  This was taken after our 30 minute nap together on the couch. I love her so much!


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## IthacaSpoo (Jan 22, 2014)

I just wanted to thank you of posting this experience. I am new to the forum and while I am nervous about our pup arriving in two weeks now I know I can really ask questions and express concerns here freely. I really appreciated these posts and know that I don't have to post only the fairy tale version of our puppy.


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## hopetocurl (Jan 8, 2014)

Can I come visit...I need some puppy love! 

Seriously, you made the right decision, I can tell by the last post....she was supposed to be yours. He was only to be with you for a short while! :angel:


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## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

IthacaSpoo: Well, I was a little nervous telling my story. I didn't want to seem like an irresponsible pet owner who couldn't handle a challenge. I'm so happy and grateful for the support I've received here. Hopefully my experience can help other pet owners too. A responsible, knowledgeable breeder is a MUST! 
Good luck with your new pup!!

Hopetocurl: Whenever you're in the area, you're welcome to come visit for some puppy breath and snuggles


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## CT Girl (Nov 17, 2010)

She is adorable. It sounds like things worked out for the best for all concerned.


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## PoodlePaws (May 28, 2013)

So cute


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


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## srshaffers (Jul 24, 2013)

Oh she is so cute!!! She reminds me so much of my Summit! She seems to be fitting in to the family nicely!! I'm so happy for you!

Here is a pic of my Summit.


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## KidWhisperer (Apr 3, 2012)

I'm glad you shared your story! Ther are (or will be) others in similar situations who are facing the same dilemma. Your story and it's positive outcome brings hope and encouragement. So congratulations on the perfect fit!


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## Poodlebeguiled (May 27, 2013)

I know there are people out there who may be in a similar situation...where a puppy is just not what they expected. And it doesn't do anyone; the family or the dog any good to force the issue for too long. It's better to avoid future trouble and find the puppy a new home. It could turn out that a dog grows up without ever connecting or becoming bonded well. And that would be a shame. 

So, don't feel rotten. You did the right thing and you didn't procrastinate. You knew. You moved on it. And you found a more suitable puppy. And that's that.


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## outwest (May 1, 2011)

I understand exactly what you are saying. When we went to visit our new puppies litter there were a couple puppies that were incredibly cute, but so bold and busy I gravitated to the sweet munchkin I ended up taking home. The boldest, busiest of the puppies went to a professional dog trainers home. I was so happy to hear that. I was able to meet the new owner, who was totally up to the task. She certainly wasn't the puppy to stay home with my older mom during the day. The puppy you sent back will be terrific at working a job. 

You will have chewing of hands with your new puppy and some other issues, I am sure, but with a more mellow puppy the problems are easily corrected. I wish you all the best.


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## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

Thanks all  Now, at almost a week since bringing Polly home, I know we've made the right decision. Polly is the perfect dog for our family. She's a puppy so she does try to chew things but she's easily corrected (just a sound like "Ot" is enough to have her back off) or distracted. She doesn't push the issue when you tell her no. She's come out of her timid little shell to be a cute, bouncy puppy but after a half an hour or so, she finds a soft spot and curls up for a nap.  My kids and husband adore her as well. The kids can run around the yard with her and she runs with them... not trying to tackle them.  
I feel like I've won the lottery.


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## CT Girl (Nov 17, 2010)

This is so wonderful to hear. I also think it was brave to take your dilemma to the forum. Many people in your situation would stick their head in the sand and pretend everything was all right and meanwhile everything would get worse. Kudos to you and your breeder for working out the best solution for both puppies. Who doesn't love a happy ending?


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## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

CT girl: Thanks for saying it was brave but really I just had to do something because I was miserable. I'm a perfectionist by nature and when I decide to do something, I want to do it as well as I can. It was making me crazy that I couldn't get through to Bingo. I couldn't just relax and let him be a puppy because he would get into trouble and terrorize the kids. With Polly, I can relax and enjoy her puppyhood because her puppy-ness is a much milder version of puppy-ness.  I don't lay awake at night wondering what I'm doing wrong. 
I now realize that this is the temperament of dog that I like best and the type of dog our family needs. I've always had gentle dogs and thought I'd like a change... a dog that didn't need to be spoken to gently. Wrong. I have enough stress with 4 daycare children 2 yrs. and under and the busy life of a family of 4... I need a dog who is the gentle part of my day.  

My husband told me last night that he was so happy I was back. I asked him what he meant and he said that he hasn't seen me this calm and happy in months. He said, "You needed her." I get choked up even thinking about it. My life was wonderful before her but now it's complete. 

Boy, am I in a sappy mood or what?


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## 3dogs (Nov 3, 2010)

I think that YOUR FAMILY did right by Bingo & returned him so that he could grow into his full potential. I am happy & relieved that the breeder took Bingo back & that you were able to find a pup with a temperament that suits your families lifestyle.

That being said I have to disagree that this is a good breeder. I really think that if they had bothered to spend time with the pups as they grow & did some type of "Temperament" testing that Bingo would have never ended up in your home to begin with. I find breeders that take deposits or sell based on Sex/Color is just plain wrong for this EXACT reason. Wrong match was made & that would not have happened if the time was taken to evaluate the individual pups & find the proper home where activity & farmily dynamics are a match for a pup. But as stated they are a large operation so steps are skipped to sell a pup.

I bred my 1st litter & even at 7-8 weeks the 2 pups temperaments were so close that it was hard to make a decision as to which one to keep even though I leaned towards my Silver. I made the right match up for my other pup but did turn away 6 other families that were interested. I just didn't think she was the right fit even though 3 families are clients of mine.


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## patk (Jun 13, 2013)

@3dogs: while i have personal doubts about this breeder, becky m did say above that she thought at first she wanted a different kind of temperament in a dog than she had been used to. she tried it and found it was wrong for her. i think it's great that the breeder took the dog back and offered her one with the temperament becky m realized after a "trial" period she preferred. i don't think anyone can fault the breeder on that point, though i tend to agree otherwise w/re to large-scale breeding operations.

becky m: apologies for jumping in on this. bottom line for me is that you and the breeder both did the right thing for all concerned. congratulations again on your wonderful pup. you're right, you've won the lottery.


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## BeckyM (Nov 22, 2013)

3 Dogs:
I still feel like the breeder, though a large breeder, was responsible. She knows the personality of each of her puppies. She told me that Bingo was a very confident, very active puppy and I ignored her warnings. I thought I wanted a confident dog. I was wrong.  So, she was very right about how she described him just right when I was picking out puppies.
She also knew Polly very well. She said she was a timid but playful puppy and she was spot on.  
I've been very happy with all of my time spent with this breeder (I've been there 3 times total now) and I wouldn't hesitate to recommend them and I will be getting all future dogs from them.


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