# New friend for my pup



## Knutdanoodle (Aug 4, 2016)

So I have wanted to adopt a second dog for a long time. I finally found one on craigslist, we did a meet and greet at a dog park and met a second time a few days later at the vet for a heartworm test (negative). I love her! She's super sweet and seems to love all people and dogs I saw her come in contact with. But my heart is breaking for her owner. It's clear she wants to keep her, but the reason for the rehome is that she is 8k in debt and expecting a baby on top of that. She's had the dog for 4 years since she was 5 months old. 
She kept saying the most heart wrenching things. 
I half am scared to adopt her, bc it's breaking the owners heart. I can't foster the girl bc my husband wouldn't be ok with it (I would but I know him), though when I mentioned fostering to the current owner she sounded like that wasn't what she was looking for. But then she would say "I don't know what I'll do without her". And sent me pictures of them cuddled up together. ):
So, I am very sad. Not sure how to handle this. 

I also would feel bad taking her home, I both believe and have read that it's best to keep the dog for a month or two before letting previous owner visit. But that sounds so horrible! 

Then what if she decides she wants her dog back because she can't handle it, and it's been over a month or something?

Has anyone experienced this? 


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

I have no experience with such a situation, but it does sound gut wrenching for sure!

In terms of responsible ownership thinking, it does seem like the right thing for the dog to be re-homed given all that is going on with the current owner. We are the sentient decision makers on such things and the needs of the dog should be kept at the top of the list of decision making factors. If you, your husband and your current dog all have "thumbs up" for it then I would go ahead. The owner who is giving this dog up will have hard sad days ahead, but she will be giving birth soon and will find new love and joy with her newborn. A baby isn't a dog, and she will still mourn having given up her dog, but her life will be full of sources of love, fun and wonderful days. In time she will come to terms with the loss of the dog and be grateful for having found a wonderful new home for her it.


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## zooeysmom (Jan 3, 2014)

Oh boy, that's a very heart-wrenching situation  If she is sure she can't afford to keep the dog, she should sell her to you with a contract. As long as she could visit the dog (like you said, after a couple of months so the dog doesn't get really confused) and you gave her first right of refusal if you ever had to give up the dog, I think it could work out. She is having a baby and that will take over her life. Good luck and please keep us posted.


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## Knutdanoodle (Aug 4, 2016)

Zooey, what is first right of refusal? I know, I don't want to confuse the dog which was the only reason I would say no visits for at least a month. But its sad. @lily thank you, yes I know she will be sad, the baby isn't too far away and that will definitely be time consuming and rewarding, so that is good. Plus we are staying in touch. And yes, it's the right thing to do given her situation and I'm actually glad she was okay with me as an adopter. 

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## zooeysmom (Jan 3, 2014)

Knutdanoodle said:


> Zooey, what is *first right of refusal*? I know, I don't want to confuse the dog which was the only reason I would say no visits for at least a month. But its sad. @lily thank you, yes I know she will be sad, the baby isn't too far away and that will definitely be time consuming and rewarding, so that is good. Plus we are staying in touch. And yes, it's the right thing to do given her situation and I'm actually glad she was okay with me as an adopter.
> 
> Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk


It's where you give them the first chance to buy the dog back if you ever had to sell her. In writing, of course!


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## glorybeecosta (Nov 11, 2014)

Knutdanoodle said:


> So I have wanted to adopt a second dog for a long time. I finally found one on craigslist, we did a meet and greet at a dog park and met a second time a few days later at the vet for a heartworm test (negative). I love her! She's super sweet and seems to love all people and dogs I saw her come in contact with. But my heart is breaking for her owner. It's clear she wants to keep her, but the reason for the rehome is that she is 8k in debt and expecting a baby on top of that. She's had the dog for 4 years since she was 5 months old.
> She kept saying the most heart wrenching things.
> I half am scared to adopt her, bc it's breaking the owners heart. I can't foster the girl bc my husband wouldn't be ok with it (I would but I know him), though when I mentioned fostering to the current owner she sounded like that wasn't what she was looking for. But then she would say "I don't know what I'll do without her". And sent me pictures of them cuddled up together. ):
> So, I am very sad. Not sure how to handle this.
> ...


If she cannot keep the dog and it is what you want take the dog, but make sure she signs and agreement that the dog is yours and she will not try to take it back. What is she charging for the dog, pay be check and get a receipt. It sounds to me the dog would be better off with you as when the new baby comes the dog will play second. 

As far as visiting the dog will remember her. My Mom made be give my dog Ranger away, it was 5 years until I seen him and he went wild jumping, whining and kissing me. Tell her you want time to get the dog adjusted to your home, say 3 or 4 months. What I have found as time passes they do not come to see the dog. Whether the pain is to much, they have forgotten and went on with their life, as many of my dogs were from 18 month to 5 years old when I got them.


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## Knutdanoodle (Aug 4, 2016)

Ok I just reread that, yes I've already told her if I had to give her up I would only give her back to her. It was actually part of the reason I looked for an animal on cl instead of a shelter. I wanted to know the dog had a home to go back to if things didn't work, with people the dog knew and trusted. I don't think that would happen in this case though because I was thorough about getting all her info before agreeing to adopt. But in the interest of the dog I want to make sure she is always secure 

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## Knutdanoodle (Aug 4, 2016)

Glory I didn't think about paying by check, and I am going to pick her up today straight from work so don't have a checkbook. I think I can trust her since it's just a rehoming fee, not a purchase fee. 
That helps me to hear the owners forget over time...not that I expect it but I know what you mean going on with their life cause they adjust and are happy again. 


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## Knutdanoodle (Aug 4, 2016)

Glory, no! I don't think dogs forget, yes she would definitely recognize people she has bonded to. I love that about dogs. Yeah when I took my poodle back to the trainer after 4 or 5 months of not going she Freaked out seeing the trainer after so long. It was adorable, dogs are people to me

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## Skylar (Jul 29, 2016)

I think it's a wonderful thing what you are doing for that woman - by adopting her dog you are giving it a loving, happy home and relieving her of the burden so she can focus on her financial problems and her new baby. 

My DD#1 did a favor for one of the vet's lab techs where she takes her cats and dog. She agreed to take the woman's two cats for a year while the woman moved back home while she went back to school to become a Xray technologist. She visited them once, called a few times and never came back for them. I thought my DD#1 was making a mistake taking them for a year - after all you bond with them and then it's hard to give them back. These two cats turned out to be such wonderful pets, they got along beautifully with her other cats and lived with her until they passed away. She also adopted a gorgeous Ragdoll cat on Craig's List from a family with children - and promised they could visit the cat - the mother phoned a few times, DD#1 emailed photos at the beginning then never heard from them again. She has a gorgeous rough collie she adopted off of CL from a family where the daughter had allergies and had to give up one year old dog - same thing the family never visited (in this case they live in a city about 2 hours away) and lost interest in my daughter's emails with photos.

Hopefully your experience will be similar to my DD#1.


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## oshagcj914 (Jun 12, 2016)

I would also recommend that you get some kind of contract written up and signed before you proceed. I have a friend fostering my cat for me until I get a new place and we wrote up an agreement for who is paying for what, and I signed a paper giving her permission to seek veterinary care in case of an accident or illness. Possession is 9/10s of the law, but it's a good idea to have some kind of surrender agreement in writing to protect everyone involved, especially the dog.


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## Knutdanoodle (Aug 4, 2016)

Hi, yes I rethought the contract and thought it might be a comfort to her if I drew one up garunteeing humane care and right of first refusal. It pretty much holds me legally accountable that if for any reason even 5 or 10 years from now I need to give her up that she'll be the first person I call and it won't cost her anything. And frees her of any possible damages she (the dog) might cause while I own her (iow I can't go back to the old owner and demand medical expenses or money for damages). It also has the amount of money i paid for the adoption fee as glory suggested, just for me, but the rest of the contract was about her and shiva (the dog). 
My friend says she could get it notarized for me. I hadn't even thought of that, so my next step is to go to a notary and then I'll send her the original. 


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## Knutdanoodle (Aug 4, 2016)

@skylar thank you
Yes I have the dog now, we will see how it goes. She has another dog she's been trying to rehome and said if she can't find a home or get him admitted to a no kill shelter she will keep him. I'm glad she won't give up on her animals, she is a great owner. I bought her some food for her other dog cause we've talked a lot about her struggle rehoming him too, and she can't afford the food. At this point I think however things are meant to work out they will. 

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