# Moral dilemma - what would you do ?



## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

With winter is here, it’s very difficult to walk outside in my neighborhood. There are no sidewalks (I would have to walk 15 minutes to get to them and it’s just too far for me) so you need to walk close to the curb (full of snow, soon). There is ice, slush, snow or a combination of those on the ground.

I can’t go outside often, but when I’m well enough, I would like the fresh air. Not for long, maybe 15-20 minutes. Beckie is tough enough to walk in those conditions, but Merlin isn’t. There is a huge difference in their body shape and Merlin is so much more fragile (toy versus miniature). Even with the boots on and the warm winter coat, after a few minutes he can’t walk anymore. I have to pick him up but I can’t carry him more than a few minutes. Even at 6 lbs, it’s too much for me. Also, dealing with two dogs in those conditions is a lot harder than just one.

So…. here’s the moral dilemma. All those years I’ve had the dogs, I never went outside except with both dogs. I would feel guilty leaving Merlin behind, as he wants to come and wouldn’t understand why he is left behind. But Beckie needs it, and it would do me good as well.

Should I change my way of thinking ? Instead of focusing on Merlin’s needs, I could focus on Beckie’s ? And mine ? Knowing that it would only be for 15-20 minutes, maybe once a week, sometimes twice ?

What would you do ?


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## Tulsi (Jun 8, 2021)

Could you take both out more often but for a shorter time?


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## twyla (Apr 28, 2010)

Would a backpack work for Merlin?


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

I would either take Beckie alone for the length of walk you think she needs and on one or two other days take Merlin for a shorter outing alone or if possible drive with both of them to an area where you can walk both of them on sidewalks. In some ways the most important thing is for you to stay physically safe yourself since nobody will benefit if you are injured.


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## Starla (Nov 5, 2020)

Fair isn’t getting the same thing, fair is everyone getting what they need. (I say this daily!) If I were you, I would take Beckie on the walks she needs and can handle and let go of the guilt. It isn’t helping anybody. I would also take just Merlin out for short jaunts if it’s not too hard on the both of you. I’ve always made a point to take dogs out walking one on one when I have multiples. Yes, it’s nice to walk together, but it’s also nice to be able to leave one behind to go to the vet or to class or just on a walk and know they will be fine.


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## cowpony (Dec 30, 2009)

I would take them out on separate walks. I did that with Snarky and Pogo due to Pogo's Amazon truck reactivity. Pogo would get Snarky all riled up, and 120 pounds of lunging dog was more than I could handle. At first the dog left home was furious; I would hear outraged yelps coming from inside the house as we ambled down the driveway. After a few days, however, they understood the new routine. Snarky always got the first walk; Pogo got the second. Eventually Pogo didn't even bother following me to the door when he saw me putting the leash on Snarky.

I'm now starting Galen and Ritter on separate walks as well. Ritter needs more attention to basic leash manners and reactivity, while Galen is starting to develop bad habits around jumping up on people. Taking the two out separately means I can be more effective in dealing with each dog's needs.


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

Starla makes a very good point. They are different dogs with different needs. The same is true with Lily and Javelin. Friday was a Javelin outing. Sunday was a Lily outing. Tomorrow and Thursday Javelin and I will be out to train. Saturday Lily and I have another day of rally trialing. I know they may not like being left behind when I am heading out the door but generally the one who stays home sleeps the day away for the most part.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Tulsi said:


> Could you take both out more often but for a shorter time?


Unfortunately, no. I am disabled and it’s just too much for me.



twyla said:


> Would a backpack work for Merlin?


I could try that. Do you have one to suggest ?



lily cd re said:


> I would either take Beckie alone for the length of walk you think she needs and on one or two other days take Merlin for a shorter outing alone or if possible drive with both of them to an area where you can walk both of them on sidewalks.


Yeah, that’s what the dilemma is about. I can’t physically do both. Not enough stamina on my part.



Starla said:


> Fair isn’t getting the same thing, fair is everyone getting what they need.


I like that, I’ll remember it !



cowpony said:


> I would take them out on separate walks.


I would if I could, but it’s not possible.


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## MaizieFrosty (Apr 12, 2019)

Dechi, you and I are so much alike. I hate the thought of hurting my dogs' feelings by taking one and leaving the other at home, but you know, if you just do it and get in a new routine, it will be fine. I had to do this with Zooey and she adapted to being left at home. She knew I still loved her.


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## twyla (Apr 28, 2010)

Dechi I have a new back pack I could send you, it is very light
A K9 sport sack


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## Puppy Love (Aug 10, 2015)

I use a dog sling when in a crowded area or Wally tires out. There are also back and front-facing doggy backpacks. Amazon and Etsy sell both, and if you're a Prime member you've got free shipping.


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## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

Don’t do anything that could put your health at risk.

I used a sling for Gracie when necessary, but I couldn’t do that anymore. It would cause me severe and lasting pain. I would also be afraid of falling, especially in blustery and/or icy weather, which would be a danger to both dog and human.

What about taking them both out for a sniff/potty and then dropping Merlin back off inside to do a proper walk with Beckie? That’s what my parents did when they had dogs with differing abilities.


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## cowpony (Dec 30, 2009)

I too would worry about falling on ice and risking injury to myself or the dog I was carrying, although studded boots make ice a lot more manageable. My town is pretty good about getting the roads cleaned within 24 hours of a storm ending. If I had a fragile elderly dog I would probably get a dog stroller, the kind with big wheels for off road use, and bundle the little guy in with a fleece blanket and a hot water bottle. Of course that idea won't work if the roads don't get plowed.


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## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

A rugged stroller is a great idea, and it could provide you with some extra stability, if needed.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

twyla said:


> Dechi I have a new back pack I could send you, it is very light
> A K9 sport sack


Oh, thank you ! I’ll send you a PM so we can see if we can figure something out !



PeggyTheParti said:


> What about taking them both out for a sniff/potty and then dropping Merlin back off inside to do a proper walk with Beckie? That’s what my parents did when they had dogs with differing abilities.


It’s a good idea but that would wear me out too much and I don’t think I’d be able to go back a second time. I’m not sure Merlin would do his business either with all the snow. He’s used to grass or going in the back yard if there is snow.

I realize this is a complicated issue. Thus my dilemma.



PeggyTheParti said:


> A rugged stroller is a great idea, and it could provide you with some extra stability, if needed


Unfortunately my street is too narrow, and often there will be cars parked on both sides of the street, because the private plower’s (not sure if that’s what you call them) have to get into people’s driveways. So it would be unsafe. This neighborhood really issn’y ideal for walking in winter.


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## Oonapup (Oct 16, 2020)

If the neighborhood is not great for you to walk in during winter anyway, maybe one solution would be to do what you can with both dogs and have a dog walker take Beckie out for longer jaunts a couple times a week?


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Oonapup said:


> If the neighborhood is not great for you to walk in during winter anyway, maybe one solution would be to do what you can with both dogs and have a dog walker take Beckie out for longer jaunts a couple times a week?


I like the idea of the dog walker. I do have one, I could ask her to come twice a week to start. I would feel so much better knowing Beckie is getting a least a little bit of exercise.


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## Dianaleez (Dec 14, 2019)

You're the foundation everyone's wellbeing rests on. So first, take care of yourself.

Dog walker, doggy stroller, whatever, what matters is your safety. Then the dogs will get the love they need.


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## Oonapup (Oct 16, 2020)

Dechi said:


> I like the idea of the dog walker. I do have one, I could ask her to come twice a week to start. I would feel so much better knowing Beckie is getting a least a little bit of exercise.


Totally. It costs money but it would also take care of any sense of injustice on Merlin’s part since he may be less likely to feel left out when it’s not you.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Oonapup said:


> Totally. It costs money but it would also take care of any sense of injustice on Merlin’s part since he may be less likely to feel left out when it’s not you.


Yeah, my animals get the most of my money, lol ! I would be rich if I didn‘t have them.


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## TeamHellhound (Feb 5, 2021)

Do what you can and try not to feel guilty about it. It won't do anyone a lick of good if you hurt yourself trying to do all the things. 

I've almost always walked multiple dogs at once. However, the three I have now (Simon the SPoo puppy, Lily the pibble, and Leo the GSD) are a combined 130 pounds.... I'm not sure I'm brave enough to try walking all three at once.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

TeamHellhound said:


> Do what you can and try not to feel guilty about it. It won't do anyone a lick of good if you hurt yourself trying to do all the things.
> 
> I've almost always walked multiple dogs at once. However, the three I have now (Simon the SPoo puppy, Lily the pibble, and Leo the GSD) are a combined 130 pounds.... I'm not sure I'm brave enough to try walking all three at once.


Ouch, that’s heavy ! Mine are a whooping 15 lbs, lol !


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## Rose n Poos (Sep 22, 2017)

I don't have your challenges but I have those same concerns for my two.



Starla said:


> Fair isn’t getting the same thing, fair is everyone getting what they need


This I intend to remember. All any of us have to do from there is figure out how to accomplish that. The dog walker sounds like a top contender.


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## fjm (Jun 4, 2010)

Would a buggy work? The right one might help you to balance while walking, and give Merlin fresh air and a short sniff jaunts, while Becky got a longer walk. If that is impossible I would walk with Becky and leave Merlin with a special Kong or other chew, then play his favourite games in the warm at home to keep things "fair". I juggle similar issues, with Sophy needing longer walks than either Poppy or Freddy can manage safely, and Freddy wanting more excitement than the older dogs find comfortable. Sometimes we compromise, sometimes I alternate, sometimes I just have to go with what is best for my own health and sanity.


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## Little Milo (Sep 1, 2021)

You have my sympathy. I had the same dilemma as my collies got older. One still loved and needed long walks while the other couldn’t go far because of her arthritis. She was the more social of the two and absolutely hated missing out on anything. I would take them both a short distance, and then bring her home and continue with my other dog. I think she was relieved not to have to try to keep going. I also agree with the other comments that you need to protect your health and safety first.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

fjm said:


> Would a buggy work? The right one might help you to balance while walking, and give Merlin fresh air and a short sniff jaunts, while Becky got a longer walk.


Can you show me the kind of buggy you’re thinking about ? Like a stroller ? It might be hard to maneuver in the snow/slush we have around here. My balance is usually okay. When it’s not I stay inside. 

I’m thinking by the time I find something, there will be too much snow outside, even for Beckie, lol !


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## fjm (Jun 4, 2010)

I have considered this sort of thing: All Terrain Dog Stroller Comparison- Best Dog Pram 2021 in the UK The trouble is that the good, stable ones are expensive and bulky for the few occasions i would need it, and the cheap ones tip over and would struggle on the fields where we walk - I suspect you may have a similar quandary.


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