# Scared to spay?



## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

Okay, I know this is a weird one. Dogs gets spayed and neutered every day. It's a common, important procedure. But I have been too anxious to make the appointment for Peggy!

Maybe my empathy chip is malfunctioning? Because all I can imagine is the horror of the whole experience from our dogs' perspective.

Right now Peggy is happy-go-lucky at the vet's office. She'd merrily trot away with anyone who tried to take her from us. Life is safe and joyful. Does spaying ruin that?

I can't remember if my past dogs were terrified of the vet from day 1, or if this lifelong fear developed after that first surgery...

I still plan on having Peggy spayed. Just thinking out loud here, wondering if anyone else has struggled with this.


----------



## Raindrops (Mar 24, 2019)

I totally get you. I will be terrified when Misha has to go in at some point. I've had a couple animals neutered before but in both cases I hadn't had them very long before the procedure so I wasn't as attached. I'm not sure what they really feel like because they're out for the entire procedure and they're very groggy after they wake up. So they may be totally fine with it.


----------



## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

I was afraid for Beckie too but the thought of what horrible diseases she could have if I didn’t do it gave me the kick I needed. And the fact that she was in depression during 6 weeks after her heat also helped...


----------



## For Want of Poodle (Feb 25, 2019)

I am quite nervous. Annie is scheduled for late May at my parents' vet, because I like and trust her far more than my own vet. But still nervous. 
I think its normal to be afraid - I remember even the last time my mom spayed her dog, she also had the 'is this the right thing' jitters, and she's had many dogs and cats spayed/neutered over the years. 

I remind myself of how happy Annie was at the emergency vet even after being sedated and having her emergency stitches a few months ago. She was sloppily loving on all the vet techs as I paid and left. My parents vet and vet techs are much more effusive/tactile with the animals - even the mean cat likes the vet - so I expect she will be fine. 

Still scary. I am especially worried about with C19, I wont be able to go into the clinic (a new place) with her, and worried they may need to keep her overnight, as she has never spent a night without me. 

My colleague highly recommended getting a laparoscopic spay. I am not going to, because i trust this vet, but if I was not using my parents vet I would definitely consider it. My colleague's breeder has it in the contract for her dogs, and he claims the recovery time/trauma was much less. 

Neutering is less intrusive, I think I would be less worried about that.


----------



## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

Raindrops said:


> I totally get you. I will be terrified when Misha has to go in at some point. I've had a couple animals neutered before but in both cases I hadn't had them very long before the procedure so I wasn't as attached. I'm not sure what they really feel like because they're out for the entire procedure and they're very groggy after they wake up. So they may be totally fine with it.


I'm definitely counting on the grogginess to make it less traumatic for her. But I imagine the pre-op stuff is pretty scary. Last time I was at the clinic with her, there was a dog absolutely _screaming_ in the back. I felt terrible for the dog, but also for Peggy who looked horrified. I quickly took her outside for a little walk while we waited. But if I wasn't there, I know it would have been stressful for her.

Sigh.

I might make my husband do the dropping off. He's much more no-nonsense about this sort of thing. When I took Gracie to be spayed, I cried in front of the receptionist. 😂


----------



## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

Dechi said:


> I was afraid for Beckie too but the thought of what horrible diseases she could have if I didn’t do it gave me the kick I needed. And the fact that she was in depression during 6 weeks after her heat also helped...


It's definitely helpful to focus on the reasons why. Thank you for the reminder. It'll be interesting to see if Peggy's personality changes at all once she's off the hormonal roller coaster. Hope not too much!


----------



## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

For Want of Poodle said:


> I am quite nervous. Annie is scheduled for late May at my parents' vet, because I like and trust her far more than my own vet. But still nervous.
> I think its normal to be afraid - I remember even the last time my mom spayed her dog, she also had the 'is this the right thing' jitters, and she's had many dogs and cats spayed/neutered over the years.
> 
> I remind myself of how happy Annie was at the emergency vet even after being sedated and having her emergency stitches a few months ago. She was sloppily loving on all the vet techs as I paid and left. My parents vet and vet techs are much more effusive/tactile with the animals - even the mean cat likes the vet - so I expect she will be fine.
> ...


I considered laparoscopic, but we'd have to travel for it. Not an option right now, unfortunately. My past dogs have always spent the night after their spay, but I'm hoping if we're still under lockdown we can drop her off early in the morning and pick her up at the end of the day. That would make me feel a little better, I think. Though I'm not sure if it's risky after a surgery like that.

That's great that you have a vet you like so much (and that Annie likes). Our clinic's excellent for a rural area, but I've always gotten the feeling the staff there doesn't love poodles. They used to _gush_ over my mini mix, Gracie.


----------



## For Want of Poodle (Feb 25, 2019)

PeggyTheParti said:


> I considered laparoscopic, but we'd have to travel for it. Not an option right now, unfortunately. My past dogs have always spent the night after their spay, but I'm hoping if we're still under lockdown we can drop her off early in the morning and pick her up at the end of the day. That would make me feel a little better, I think. Though I'm not sure if it's risky after a surgery like that.
> 
> That's great that you have a vet you like so much (and that Annie likes). Our clinic's excellent for a rural area, but I've always gotten the feeling the staff there doesn't love poodles. They used to _gush_ over my mini mix, Gracie.


Unfortunately, that's the worry. She's never met the staff. Its been my parents vet for more than a decade in a small town, so I know the staff well. We have a standing invitation to drive to the vets house and pet her horses. The office always gushes over the animals, which is not true of my city vet, who seems afraid of dogs and doesn't even pet them. I know the one time she had bloodwork done at our vet, she came back scared. She wasnt scared from bloodwork at the emergency vet, which says something! 

I hope your plan to bring her home works- we have done it both ways, and I think it's way better to bring the dog home the first night if possible, far less stressful for everyone. My parents vet does insist the dog remains within an hour drive for 5 days after spay in case of emergency, and gives people her cell number for emergencies.


----------



## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

Ohhhh. I didn't realize Annie hadn't met your parents' vet. I still think that clinic sounds like a wonderful fit. Having a personal relationship with the staff is invaluable. They'll be so excited to meet Annie and that will put her right at ease. 

Let us know how it goes!


----------



## Asta's Mom (Aug 20, 2014)

I well remember when we had Pinky our beloved springer spaniel spayed. What traumatized me was how sedated she was when I picked her up in the evening. I hadn't thought the anesthesia would last so long. Nothing wrong, no emergency but she was even a little groggy the next day.

Asta's neuter was a breeze in comparison.

Still I think it would be best to have her spayed for all the health reasons (others may disagree) and I am glad that I spayed Pinky. She lived to the ripe old age of 13 with no health problems until her last days.


----------



## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

I've experienced over-sedation with my last girl and it was very scary. They gave her too high a dose for her weight. 

Years later, she had almost a dozen teeth extracted, and her little voice was so hoarse after. I'm guessing from the intubation? I tried offering her water and it sounded like she shrieked "No!!" 

I find it hard not being able to explain to them what's going on. That's probably what gives me the most anxiety. I imagine it would feel a little like being abducted and experimented on by aliens.

But yes, it's important we do what's best for them in the long run.


----------



## Mufar42 (Jan 1, 2017)

Well good luck..ou will get thru it. I was a basket case when I took Renn in to be neutered. Never gave it a second thought with other dogs in past. Maybe because his was later Then I kept him either in his crate or there'd to me for the full two weeks. And..I took pictures of his incision the first week because I was convinced there was blood accumulation or infection as it was extremely red. I had never noticed that before but I think its because he is white and he is sensitive too. Anyway after about 4 or 5 days the red beacon to turn pink tail one day it looked as I expected it too and I stopped with the pictures. LOL But I was very nervous and I am normally calm about such things. I also cried when I dropped him off, silly and not me at all.


----------



## Getting ready (May 4, 2019)

My girls did fine with their spay and Noodle with his neuter. He is more afraid of the vet now after nail clipping and ear plucking. I think it is because he can’t stop by for treats and snuggles. I try to give him treats outside the door when we walk by. These times make it all harder. Good luck to Peggy.


----------



## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

Mufar42 said:


> Well good luck..ou will get thru it. I was a basket case when I took Renn in to be neutered. Never gave it a second thought with other dogs in past. Maybe because his was later Then I kept him either in his crate or there'd to me for the full two weeks. And..I took pictures of his incision the first week because I was convinced there was blood accumulation or infection as it was extremely red. I had never noticed that before but I think its because he is white and he is sensitive too. Anyway after about 4 or 5 days the red beacon to turn pink tail one day it looked as I expected it too and I stopped with the pictures. LOL But I was very nervous and I am normally calm about such things. I also cried when I dropped him off, silly and not me at all.


I do think waiting is making it harder! I cried when I dropped Gracie off, but I didn't think twice about booking the appointment. 

All this is making me think it's very good I never had children. They'd be bubble-wrapped well into their adult years. 😂


----------



## PeggyTheParti (Sep 5, 2019)

Getting ready said:


> My girls did fine with their spay and Noodle with his neuter. He is more afraid of the vet now after nail clipping and ear plucking. I think it is because he can’t stop by for treats and snuggles. I try to give him treats outside the door when we walk by. These times make it all harder. Good luck to Peggy.


Aw. Poor Noodle. This is why it's so amazing to me that Peggy loves her groomer! None of what goes on in there is fun for her, and yet she can't wait to get inside. 

It really is a mystery why some unpleasant experiences stick with them while others just roll off their back.


----------



## Porkchop (Sep 2, 2019)

Robin, I feel the exact same apprehension as you about spaying Lacey. Like you mentioned, just imagining how scary it must be prior to the surgery— waiting in a crate and crying in fear/hearing other animals in fear. I also hate imagining her having to stay there overnight in a strange place and no mom or dad while all drugged up. I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep while she’s gone. 

Seeing as I just had Lacey put under to remove retained teeth a couple weeks ago, I feel like she will be a little better prepared for her spay. I cried the second I was pulling away from the parking lot and I know I will cry again for this. Probably right as I hand her though the car window (assuming they will still be doing that procedure when it’s time for her spay). I don’t care though! Having my boyfriend drop her off isn’t going to make me feel better as I want to be with her as much as possible before she goes off to surgery. On the off chance something were to happen. Macabre, I know.

I know it’s routine and common but it’s still a major surgery cutting into the abdominal wall and to us pet parents that’s a big deal. I REALLY wish her vet had the option to do it laparoscopically. It makes a world of difference in recovery time and risk of post surgical complications, at least in humans. 
Another concern of mine is proper pain control. I’m worried they’ll just give her meloxicam/NSAID. I will be talking to the vet about that, because it’s downright abusive not to give a stronger analgesic with it for at least the first few days after a spay.

Right now my vet isn’t doing neuter or spay surgeries so I don’t know when that will become an option again. Are vets in your area doing them?



Anyway, just wanted to chime in and long-windly share that I’m feeling the same as you. But it needs to be done for our dog’s safety and health.


----------

