# Extreme Separation Anxiety



## PammiPoodle (Jul 16, 2011)

Oh, boy, is this close to home! Lumi does the same thing. Full on tantrum. Screaming, throwing her bedding, those high pitched barks like someone's pinching her, angry growls and thrashing in her crate, yodeling!! It's heartbreaking. We've made SO much improvement, though, in these last few weeks!! I'm actually watching a video right now of how she behaved after I left her in the crate tonight when I went to a friend's house. Just a few minutes of half-hearted whimpers and then she was out like a light!

I'd say all you've read about teaching them at home is the same stuff that Leroy needs, just change the location! Toss some treats in a work crate and let him go in for them. Gradually get him used to the door closing behind him, and then opening right back up. Then teach him that he can stay in there for a just a few seconds and get a cookie and freedom. I'm sure he'll learn to accept it just like he does at home! It will probably take a lot of time, though, considering he's already formed such a strong dislike for it. It'd be good to visit work on your time off just to do training with him, and if you can, avoid crating him there until he's learned it's okay. With Lumi I absolutely had to crate her while I worked since she was just a baby, and she would freak out the ENTIRE time!! I'm sure you know how that is. I work from home, so I could hear it. At the end of the day I'd let her out and for all our after-work crate training, we just couldn't get past the anxiety. It's hard to teach a dog to have a positive association with something after they just spent hours being frightened by it! Especially if that's happening every day! 

What I'm currently doing with Lumi is placing her crate only a few feet from me while I work. That's actually taken us a few weeks. At first, the only way I could have her in there without being upset was directly against my shoes! Hahaha I had to keep my leg pressed against the crate and she felt safe. Every day I would step away from it for moments at a time, gradually longer and longer. Then I began to place the crate a few inches further. Now she's a few feet from me and quite content. I need to get it all the way out of the grooming room, though, as I'm afraid being by the HV will make her deaf!! I nearly am!! Hahaha I did this simply so that she wasn't having hours of negative experiences every day. It was basically damage control. We still have to work on teaching her that the crate is a fun and safe place to be in our off hours. We're making much progress. : ) Lumi's not officially house trained, and can't be trusted yet to not chew herself through a leash, so being crated is a necessity. Maybe with Leroy you can have him tethered to your table or a point on the wall with a nice blankey to curl up on until you've got him comfortable enough with the crate to stay in there. 

Waiting out tantrums is important so dogs don't learn they get them what they want. At the same time, an animal who is so stressed that they become hysterical, isn't really in a state of mind to learn much of anything. Sometimes it's best to just remove them from the situation and get them into a less stressed state. Not through comforting or rewarding, but just taking them for a quick stroll on leash, or reviewing a few well-known commands and a pat on the head. Also, if you find waiting for quiet is tacking an extra 10 minutes on his sentence, try just waiting for *less* noise. Haha As he progresses you'll require more of him, but for now you may have to settle for "better behavior" rather than "good behavior". : P

Yes, I think both of your ideas about crating him more often and giving him some alone time would be great for him, and you! : ) I'm totally right there with you on this one! Please let me know how he does!!


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## fjm (Jun 4, 2010)

I'm not sure this is separation anxiety, if he is fine when you leave him alone at home. Perhaps it is more fear, and frustration at being able to see and hear you, but not get to you, which then builds up into more and more stress? I think I would work on it at home without the crate at first, in case he has associated the crate with a frightening experience - perhaps by teaching him a Place cue that sends him to a mat or bed, where he can see you, and using treats - or click and treat - to build up the time he stays there. Then move the bed into an open crate, and start again. Then take him into your workplace for a few happy visits with you, before if possible repeating the whole mat/crate process in your workplace when it is empty, and again at a very quiet time. It must have been quite a shock to him to be suddenly trapped in a new environment, surrounded by strange dogs and people, and unable to get to you. I suspect if you take a few weeks to introduce him to it gradually you will set him up for years of snoozing quietly while you work!


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## tokipoke (Sep 3, 2011)

I would LOVE for him to be a shop dog, but his personality is erratic. This issue took months to develop and I understand that it will not be resolved in a week. I was told I could bring him one more week and "see how it goes" but that is a short time trying to improve this high level of anxiety. 

I believe he's okay at home because he knows the ins & outs of the house, he is familiar with all the smells. He's fed here, he has all his toys and bones here. He has his kitty siblings, he knows we'll come back if he's crated. At the shop, being in an environment where there's new customers and dogs all the times can be overwhelming. Also, when the shop isn't busy, he's allowed to be out, and he usually sleeps by me. Whenever I get a client I put him in a crate - but he does not know this is only -temporary- and he freaks out. It is also probably confusing to him that one minute he's allowed to roam around but the next he isn't. Because I do not own the salon, I can't be bringing in a dog who will scare customers. We have a lobby area with a little window. He will jump up there and try to see who's in the lobby. Some people like this, others are scared. Especially if they are clients who are used to little dogs, and if they are older. They do not want some massive poodle trying to get to them. I've been trying to stop the jumping but it's been hard to control the environment. He's always rewarded for his jumping because people pet him. 

I was trying to get a client's dog out in the lobby area and forgot about Leroy, he slipped out behind me - it is so hard to keep an eye on him because he's literally my shadow - the client was making all kinds of excited high pitched noises directed at HER dog, but this got Leroy so riled up be started jumping ALL over her. I was so mortified. I was holding her dog and didn't want to put her dog down because he growled at Leroy earlier, so was afraid he would bite my dog. I kept trying to tell the client to push Leroy off and scoot him into the other room. She was so overwhelmed with Leroy's gangly legs and he even smacked her in the face with his paws!!! So embarrassing. I know I should have crated him first and THEN got the clients dog but I wasn't thinking in the rush of the moment. I do not ever want anyone to get hurt where I work. The lady was okay but I just thought what if it was a small child or an elderly person. I managed to get him behind the lobby door, where he ran around to the other side and jumped on the window to see me. I went outside to get change and Leroy FLIPPED out. He was barking his head off through the window. This is so not good for business! He also greets every dog too enthusiastically and doesn't understand that some dogs do NOT want to interact with him. So... he has lots of things he needs to work on. It's either he's causing trouble or he's crated and barking his head off. It makes it a chaotic work situation for clients who walk in the shop - cause all they hear is barking barking barking and the dogs on the table are hyped up. I would let him hang out outside of the crate but he likes to circle the grooming table. Some dogs are okay with this, others get defensive. Leroy does not understand to go to a spot and just chill there till I'm done. 

I have a LOT of work to do with him at home. I am also part of the problem too because I don't like to be far away from my pets either. All my animals are very whiny and I created this! My cats are never far from me and when I tried to nap with the bedroom door closed they cried for over an hour, scratching at the door and sounding very desperate (I always leave the bedroom door open). Most cats are off doing their thing but mine are sitting next to me all the time. I have three shadows at home because Leroy and my two cats follow me everywhere. 

I put Leroy in a small bathroom and increased the time he was in there. He didn't make a sound! He didn't seem too distressed either. I guess it'll be a longer time length before he gets anxious at home, because he's so comfortable here, whereas it only takes him a few seconds to escalate in a new environment. I will be working with him and let you know my progress. As I write this, my cat keeps moving closer and closer to me - but there's no where to go! He's trying to bury INTO me. *sigh*


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## fjm (Jun 4, 2010)

I do sympathise - I need a really big armchair to accommodate me, two dogs and two cats. Perhaps he will always be happier in the familiar surroundings of home - or with a lot of work those unfamiliar places may become part of home. Perhaps there is an element of co-dependency here, with you feeling happier if your animals really need you? Take a deep breath, step back, and consider what is best for you all long term. Then think about how you will teach them all to be happy with that. You are the human, with the brain that is capable of long term planning - there is a reason why they have accepted you as a permanent "parent"!


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## tokipoke (Sep 3, 2011)

I've been leaving Leroy at home this week instead of taking him to work with me. I hate doing it because he's crated for so long, but he's taken to it well. He's just extra playful when I come home. I am thinking of putting him in daycare maybe 1-2 days a week. Any thoughts on how this will improve/worsen his separation anxiety? 

I've been working with him at home trying to distance him from me more. He follows me everywhere at home because I let him. I've begun to close the bathroom door more. It's good that I get more privacy when I use the bathroom or shower lol. I took him to the dog park today to tire him out before the start of our training session. After leaving the dog park, I walked over to a picnic table and tied him off to it. I told him to sit, down, and stay as I scooted away. I started off only a short distance and he seemed okay. I scooted a little further and he went nuts. I realized that he has a really good sense of direction: when I'd scoot close to the lake or the woods, he allowed me to go further than when I scooted more towards the parking lot! He FLIPPED out when he thought I was leaving him. I was literally only a couple feet away. I'm sure people in the park thought I was abusing my dog form the way he was desperately crying. He only gets triggered like this in public so this is where I have to train him, unfortunately. I kept scooting away in different directions to where he would not panic - clicked my clicker, and gave a treat. Told him to stay, scooted away some more, waited for a response, if he was quiet and stayed in his down-stay, I clicked and gave a treat. I am planning on continuing this training everyday in the park until he "gets it." Do you think I'm on the right track with this method of training or is there a better way? I am very open to any advice in order to curb his anxiety! 

After he accepts some distance from me in the park scenario, I am planning on doing the same training with a car - leave him in the car (with the windows down) and scoot away little by little. Never out of sight, but far enough to where he's not RIGHT next to me. My ultimate goal is to test him out at the salon but not going to take him there yet till I work with him more at home.


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## fjm (Jun 4, 2010)

I think teaching him to wait quietly for you is excellent training, but I am not sure it will help a great deal in the salon. It sounds as if his anxiety there is because of the stressful environment, full of strange dogs, people, stuff and noises, rather than simply being separated from you. Perhaps you need to address that end of it, as well as helping him to be happy at a little distance from you.


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## tokipoke (Sep 3, 2011)

He flips out the same way whether I try to walk away from the park, dog park, the car, or crate in the salon. I do plan on doing some training in the salon but he also needs work at home. I'm working with him again on walking on the leash and correcting his excitability when he sees children and squirrels (practicing 'watch me' command). If he understands to be calm in many public situations, I believe it'll make training at the salon easier. I really think his stress comes from not being able to stay close to me at work and he's even more frustrated that he can't get to me while some 'strange' dogs is getting all the attention from me. Although I'm teaching him boundaries, the training sessions will bring us closer together!


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