# Doggie diapers and other sad considerations



## lisasgirl (May 27, 2010)

I'm so sorry that Tamara is doing so poorly. I know things have been rough for you guys lately, and I'm sorry this has to happen on top of it.

You should be able to get dog diapers at just about any big box pet store, I think. If not, they should be on Amazon. I can't recommend any specific brands, unfortunately. I will say you might want to start with a small quantity, as some dogs don't handle having to wear them very well.

As for your daughter, it'll be difficult but I'm sure she'll understand. I will say that it's probably best if she can be there if/when Tamara goes. My childhood dog (we were best friends, she's the one my username comes from) developed congestive heart failure while I was away at college and passed away before I could come home. I've always regretted not being there with her at the end.

Again, I'm sorry for everything that's happening right now. Hopefully we can at least be here for you in some way, even from across the internet.


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## Liz (Oct 2, 2010)

Those are tough considerations. I hope the diapers give Tamara and you some comfort.


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## Bluemoon (Dec 30, 2015)

Dechi said:


> Tamara is not getting any better. Some days she is confused for 2-3 hours straight, somedays not. But there is a pattern now where she will pee and poo in the house everyday. She doesn't ask for the door, she just does it. And she pees in her bed, I don't know why, probably because she is confused. She is a 12 year old Chihuahua. 12 yo is not too old for a Chi, but I guess her brain is getting weaker and weaker.
> 
> We try to take her out more during the day, like 5-6 times at least, but if we forget, she goes. Sometimes, even if we don't forget, she does it and I never seem to see her, I just step in it, dry or wet. This morning, I was late and she soiled her bed and the floor. Both Merlin and her were sitting in the peed on bed when I noticed it. Merlin doesn't mind the pee because he was raised (not by me) being allowed to soil his bed. Tamara would have never sat in her own pee before, she was a proud dog. Today is the first time and it makes me think that she is getting even more confused.
> 
> ...


With my late tpoo, we used washable ones and placed liners in them.


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## twyla (Apr 28, 2010)

I don't know if this will help other than I understand.

Almost 16 yr old Flower has the opposite issue as Tamara's, Flower is only incontinent when she sleeps, Flower sleeps really deep. This started for her around 13 1/2 years of age, it took awhile to get under control with meds Flower takes 25mg of Proin and 5mg of Incurin daily to control this issue. While I was trying to get this under control I used newborn diapers, Flower has no tail, I still have a package of diapers on hand just in case.

According to my vet it's not uncommon for a dog as they age to lose control over their bladder and/or sphincter.


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## zooeysmom (Jan 3, 2014)

I'm so sorry, Dechi  When our silky terrier, Dustin, started wetting himself, that was his time to go. He was 17 or 18 and was just miserable and my mom and I took him in. It was devastating, even though he was old, but we knew it was the right thing to do for him. You'll know when it's her time. I know you're thinking of your daughter, but you have to do what's right for your stress level and Tamara's. Hugs and love to you.


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## lily cd re (Jul 23, 2012)

I am sorry that things are so rough for all of you with Tamara's old age brain problems. I hope that clear answers present themselves.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

lisasgirl said:


> I'm so sorry that Tamara is doing so poorly. I know things have been rough for you guys lately, and I'm sorry this has to happen on top of it.
> 
> You should be able to get dog diapers at just about any big box pet store, I think. If not, they should be on Amazon. I can't recommend any specific brands, unfortunately. I will say you might want to start with a small quantity, as some dogs don't handle having to wear them very well.
> 
> ...


Yes, I do appreciate all the help and support from this forum. It really makes a difference !

Big thanks to everyone who takes the time to answer.


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## Muggles (Mar 14, 2015)

I have no advice sorry, only sympathy.


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## UKpoodle (Jul 22, 2015)

That is so sad, it must be a heartbreaking and incredibly tough decision to make. Like lisasgirl says, there are lots of people here to support and comfort you whenever you need it xx


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## Poodlebeguiled (May 27, 2013)

Awww Dechi. I am so very sorry it's getting so bad with Tamara. Like it was said already, you'll know when the quality of her life has reached a point where there is more difficulty than joy. When the joy becomes less and less...it's time to start thinking about it. I'm not quite there yet with Jose`. He doesn't have incontinence issues at all and knows to go to the door and whine to be let out. But he's confused in some other ways and has some persistent restlessness. No physical cause can be found. So it's probably plain old cognitive decline. I can empathize with you, as can many with senior dogs...they're very difficult to take care of...lots of special needs. Any time you need to talk or lean on someone, I've got a good shoulder. (((hugs)))

It's hard with daughters, isn't it. Mine has a particularly hard time with accepting death. So it is always incredibly and extremely devastating to her and they're not even her dogs. She's had a hard time with all my past dogs...really hard time. I hope your daughter will come to understand that the dog's comfort, joy and happiness can not all be drained away here on earth...that it's a kindness to let the dog go before they suffer without anything left that they like. I'm sure when the time does come, she'll just have to understand but of course our precious ones are so very missed. I was just thinking about my little Chulita last night and was missing her all over again. 

Although this is a real tear jerker, it drives home that euthanization when the time is right is the kindest gift we can give our pets. Maybe it will help your daughter. You've probably seen it before. But it is special. 

I hope your little Tamara still gets a few fun times and things she likes...walks, cuddles... I won't wait until the last spark of light goes out of my little Jose`'s eyes. 



> The Last Battle
> If it should be that I grow frail and weak
> And pain should keep me from my sleep,
> Then will you do what must be done,
> ...


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## ApricotsRock (Jan 10, 2014)

So so sorry. Read your post and I'm back fifteen plus years dealing with this with #1. It is so hard. It is so frustrating. So many tears were shed. So much guilt. 

I did find the best solution was a pack and play (baby play yard). #1 used to get lost in the house, I came home one day and found him exhausted from being lost in the dining room table chairs. That's when we realized he could no longer be free after being free for 14 years in that house. 

Back to the play yard...it was the only thing that calmed him down. He felt safe in there and was the only place he could calm down. 

He was a toy...to give you an idea of size. He was also blind and deaf at the time he got doggie dimension. He was our first dog together...we got him on Valentine's Day. Dh held him in the palm of his hand the entire ride home. Loved him so much and to lose him was so hard. I so wish there was more we could have done. Please know I am sending positive thoughts your way...


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

PB, your poem is beautiful but very hard to read... I couldn't finish it but I will come back to it.

ApricotsRock, your story brought tears to my eyes. 

Today is a very bad day I must say, not only because of Tamara. it helps reading you.


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## ApricotsRock (Jan 10, 2014)

Omg how much are you trying to deal with? I wish I had answers for you...good luck and try to take care of yourself. These damn drugs are ravaging our communities...

I didn't want to make you cry sorry!


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## Poodlebeguiled (May 27, 2013)

Dechi. I started to read that poem too, after a long time of not having read it. And I couldn't get through either. My eyes were too full of tears to see and plus, I just didn't want to at that time. But yes, it is such a wonderful poem.

Apricots...I'm sorry how you went through such a hard time back then. It's quite difficult to see our once vibrant dogs losing their grasp. Today, after our second walk of the day...just a while ago, after I brought the dogs home, I decided to go to the mail box up the street to get my mail. I went into the garage to get my mail box key that's in my car and then came back in and went out the front door. Jose` was watching all this, as he's quite the velcro boy. He saw me go out the front door. Normally, in that case, he's wait there near the front door. When I came back from the mail box, he was standing in the laundry room, right in front of the door to the garage. He just looked so confused. And he can't hear well. So until I walked up along side him, he didn't hear me come in or know what was going on. It's just heart breaking. Very hard. It will likely happen to all of us if we live long enough. I can see it creeping in now a little bit. Memory, a little confusion. It's terrible for us...not so sure it's as bad for them. But watching them is difficult, isn't it. 

But ya know what? We're resilient creatures too. We can garner up strength where it is needed. It doesn't always come easily but once we gather up even a tiny bit of acceptance, it gives us some more strength. 

Enjoy the time you have left with Tamara and I'll do the same with Jose`. It's important...I think it gives us comfort to know we're giving them lots of love and comfort in a time when they really need it. (((hugs)))


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## Skylar (Jul 29, 2016)

It's so hard when our pets become old and have serious health issues. 

I don't know if you and Tamara can wait until your daughter goes away for her masters. Once your daughter will be living away from home and away from Tamara she will be adjusting to living without Tamara - it might be easier for her to accept putting Tamara to sleep - of course waiting till she is home visiting to do so.

OTOH I had to put one of our cats to sleep when my kids were teenagers - both were very unhappy and angry at me for doing so, but they got over it quickly and as adults now they have had to face serious illness with their pets and one daughter has had to put several of hers to sleep.

Bottom line pick the right time based on Tamara's needs.


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## marialydia (Nov 23, 2013)

Oh Dechi you have so very much going on. We are thinking of you; it is very hard, and so many of us know this all too well.

And the poem -- Poodlebeguiled, I willed myself to read it, thinking of course of Jupiter who will have been gone two months, in two days from now. Dechi, I think of Jupiter all the time, but am more and more convinced that it was absolutely the right thing to do, and maybe even a tad late; his final crisis was so hard on him. Just know that you and Tamara are in our thoughts; give her lots of love; and let her help guide you in your decisions.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

marialydia said:


> Oh Dechi you have so very much going on. We are thinking of you; it is very hard, and so many of us know this all too well.
> 
> And the poem -- Poodlebeguiled, I willed myself to read it, thinking of course of Jupiter who will have been gone two months, in two days from now. Dechi, I think of Jupiter all the time, but am more and more convinced that it was absolutely the right thing to do, and maybe even a tad late; his final crisis was so hard on him. Just know that you and Tamara are in our thoughts; give her lots of love; and let her help guide you in your decisions.


Thank you for sharing your story with Jupiter. I know it was hard for you. I am glad to know you feel good about your decision and if and when I take mine, I hope I do too.


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## MollyMuiMa (Oct 13, 2012)

My heart aches for you................it a hard thing to accept when you know it is close to the 'time' and you are doing all you can to make that decision at the right 'time'....when 'quality' is fighting 'quantity'......only you can know in your heart when Tamara is no longer living in joy. The most unselfish gift that comes from a place of love and caring.
Make her coming days comfortable and painless, give her all her favorite things and hold her in your arms and whisper in her ear how much you appreciate her love and devotion.
She will let you know when it is time...........Bless you.


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## Asta's Mom (Aug 20, 2014)

So hard Dechi, my heart aches for you. Hopefully the diapers will help you in the close run and give you a little more time with Tamara. I wish you all the joy of her.


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

Asta's Mom said:


> So hard Dechi, my heart aches for you. Hopefully the diapers will help you in the close run and give you a little more time with Tamara. I wish you all the joy of her.


Her waist is so small (10'inches) that I haven't found anything yet. I'll keep looking.

This morning we had 2 poo poos in the house. She is starting to be a bad influence on Merlin. He had neven pooed in the house before. :-(


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## UKpoodle (Jul 22, 2015)

Dechi said:


> Her waist is so small (10'inches) that I haven't found anything yet. I'll keep looking.
> 
> This morning we had 2 poo poos in the house. She is starting to be a bad influence on Merlin. He had neven pooed in the house before. :-(


This company do a female belly band and they come in xxs which fits a 9-11.5 inch waist, but it looks like they're based in the US so not sure about shipping costs to Canada?
Sorry I may be wrong as I don't have any experience with this kind of thing but a female belly band might be better then a diaper, as I imagine cleaning up after a dog that's pooed in a diaper would be very messy? Possibly easier to clean poo up off the floor then trying to clean it out of the dogs fur?
Girl Belly Bands | The Official BellyBands.net Website!!!


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

UKpoodle said:


> This company do a female belly band and they come in xxs which fits a 9-11.5 inch waist, but it looks like they're based in the US so not sure about shipping costs to Canada?
> Sorry I may be wrong as I don't have any experience with this kind of thing but a female belly band might be better then a diaper, as I imagine cleaning up after a dog that's pooed in a diaper would be very messy? Possibly easier to clean poo up off the floor then trying to clean it out of the dogs fur?
> Girl Belly Bands | The Official BellyBands.net Website!!!


Ohhh, I never thought of that. I never bought diapers for a female. But you're right, I want the poo on the floor, much easier to pick up and clean ! But don't hygienic bands for females cover the bum also ? If not I wonder how it can cover the right area properly !

I checked your link and decided to order from there. Pretty expensive, 67$ canadian for 2 girl belly-bands... i hope I don't have to pay any duty on top of that !

Thank you ! ;-)


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## UKpoodle (Jul 22, 2015)

Dechi said:


> Ohhh, I never thought of that. I never bought diapers for a female. But you're right, I want the poo on the floor, much easier to pick up and clean ! But don't hygienic bands for females cover the bum also ? If not I wonder how it can cover the right area properly !
> 
> I checked your link and decided to order from there. Pretty expensive, 67$ canadian for 2 girl belly-bands... i hope I don't have to pay any duty on top of that !
> 
> Thank you ! ;-)


Ouch that is pricey, hope they work for you. Did you manage to work out if they'll cover her bum? It's a bit hard to tell from the pictures on the website. Why is it so hard to find incontinence product for tiny female dogs? I mean, you can't be the only one out there with this issue. Maybe you'll have to invent something yourself and patent it, haha!
The poo/nappy issue came to mind because Gunther has recently been recovering from having a lump removed from his leg and you may recall I was posting on here desperately looking for ways to stop him getting to his wound to lick the staples out (the cone wasn't working). Eventually I managed to find a pair of my kids old shorts that fit him perfectly, but one day I let him outside to toilet (forgetting he was wearing them) then he went to squat and poo and as soon as I realised I was running across the garden screaming 'nooooooo' like some crazy woman, desperately grappling with his shorts trying to pull them down whilst he just carried on regardless! It must've been quite a sight for the neighbours!
Luckily it just 'rolled' out of the leg of the shorts!!!


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## Dechi (Aug 22, 2015)

UKpoodle said:


> Ouch that is pricey, hope they work for you. Did you manage to work out if they'll cover her bum? It's a bit hard to tell from the pictures on the website. Why is it so hard to find incontinence product for tiny female dogs? I mean, you can't be the only one out there with this issue. Maybe you'll have to invent something yourself and patent it, haha!
> The poo/nappy issue came to mind because Gunther has recently been recovering from having a lump removed from his leg and you may recall I was posting on here desperately looking for ways to stop him getting to his wound to lick the staples out (the cone wasn't working). Eventually I managed to find a pair of my kids old shorts that fit him perfectly, but one day I let him outside to toilet (forgetting he was wearing them) then he went to squat and poo and as soon as I realised I was running across the garden screaming 'nooooooo' like some crazy woman, desperately grappling with his shorts trying to pull them down whilst he just carried on regardless! It must've been quite a sight for the neighbours!
> Luckily it just 'rolled' out of the leg of the shorts!!!


Ha Ha Ha ! Too funny, I can just picture you and poor Gunther !

I couldn't see the bum, really, but I think there is a chance it won't be covered. It seems very well made, the best I have seen anywhere. So much better than those diapers !


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